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Chapter 0

Spoiler

The scene opens to a darkred bleeding sky.

As creatures that look like machines zip true the sky.

An almost Futuristic city is seen under siege by this beings, as the cyber like creatures are seeing fighting the warriors of the Sanctuary.

Male 1: Keep going,. Do not look back.

Female: But brother, we can't just leave them.

A male warrior dressed in gold with a wolf motief armor and a female with an angel motif are seen entering a cave in the mountains.

Female: Is this the area ?

clashing of swords can be heard as two warriors fell from the sky.

BlackWarrior: Arg, I never...i didnt mean for.

The second warrior dressed in and red and gold gets up from the ground.

Red Warrior: Get up, get up and fight. Because I'm not ready to hear you complain in the after world.

The camera shows a GIANT cyber dragon descending from above the two warriors.

The two stands to there feet and draw there sheathed blades, beginning to transform with wings coming out of both there backs.

But the dragon fires 2 pares of circle like red rings and seal there blades.

Both the Warriors in Red and Black are shocked with disbelief.

A cyber warrior with a long blade hovers behind the dragon as if scanning both warriors.

Black Warrior: Its hopeless.

As despair fall on the face of both warriors, a light arrow strikes the dragons left eye.

Female: GET IN THE DAMN CAVE NOW!!!

Both warriors hurry to the cave, there blades still locked with the red rings. The dragon in unleashes a lazer dragon breath attack, making both warriors fly into the cave. As dust covers the entrance area, another light arrow strikes the dragons second eye leaving it blind.

the as all three warriors enter deeper into the cave the male gold warrior is seen typing on a screen. Behind him a gaint Circle machine.

Red Warrior: What is that.

Male Warrior: Our last salvation created by the greatest minds in all of Cray. Kept secret to all other except those close to political power.

The machine actives creating a gate in the circle.

Male Warrior: This will take us across the nexus where we can plan the next stage of attack

Female Warrior: No, this is our home. We always fight, we always won. You expect us to leave our friends, our families-

Male Warrior: So they wouldnt have died in vain!!

A short Silence falls in the cave. The Cyber Dragon's cry can be heard outside. The warrior in black walks towards the portal, no one stopping him.

The warrior in red behinds to follow suit, but stops as they both saw the Cyber swordsman has entered the cave.

Cyber Swordsman: Target Sited and locked, beginning termination.

He says setting his sights on the red warrior. The Male in gold attacks him, managing to hold him down.

Male Warrior: GO, GOOOOO !!!

Both remaining warriors run into the portal. The warrior in red turns in the moment The Male warrior is seen with the cyber swordsmans blade out of his back.

Red Warrior: Noaaa, Gaaaar- !!!

The female grabs him and the both vanish as the portal shuts down.

Compute: All systems terminated, Dimensional Transportation no longer operational

The Cyber swordsman Look down at the Male Warrior, the Male smirks at it.

The Cyber swordsman pulls his blade out of the Male.

the screen goes dark as the the sound of the sword roughly being pulled of flesh can be heard.

Cyber Swordsman:Subject Garmore, Terminated.

The screen opens to a young man awakening from his bed.

The screen cuts to him fully dressed, putting a deck holder to his belt as he walks out.

COMING SOON TO THIS FORUM.

Cray Vivire

Chapter 1

Spoiler

The Camera opens with the word sign "1 year ago"

a postal-delivery can be seen with a man honking in-front of a house.

a young man walks out of the house

?:I'm coming, I'm coming!

the young man signs for the package and the deliveryman hands it over to him.

?: This can't be. the young man says in shock.

On the box the name Jai Of Hearts is written on it.

He quickly opens the box, taking out a smartphone like device with the appearance of the back of a vanguard card.

?: what is this sopouse to be ? O the instructions are in the box. Place your thump in the middle of the card.

The device begins to blow with a blue light, reflected in the young mans eyes.

the screen goes white.

the camera opens to the current time as a the same young man is seen looking at a clock in a classroom.

Teacher: now remember that this will be on your exams for bla bla bla bla

the young man is seen looking at the clock with an intence vision waiting for the long hand to reach 1.

Teacher: blai bai Jai !

Jai: Yea ?

Teacher: Have you been listening to what i said.

Jai: weeeeellll.

Jai's eyes shifts to the clock and back to his teacher.

Jai: Guess we will see on the exams.

The long hand on the clock reaches one and the bell rings.

Teacher: Well i hope you atleast.

The teacher turns to look at Jai, but hes already left his seat.

CARDFIGHT FORUM PROUDLY PRESENTS.

Jai enters a bus.

Jai: Drive now.

Busdriver: Sit now.

WRITTEN BY JAI OF HEARTS.

Jai exits the bus and runs into his house.

He grabs device on his desk and removes it from its charger.

On its screen the words "update complete" can be seen.

Cray: Vivire, a Cardfight Vanguard!! fan-fic.

Jai can be seen appearing from a blue light into a open area near a statue.

He takes a few steps farward and the camera moves behind him to show A Huge Colosseum full of people as a celebration is taking place.

Jai:(welcome to Cardfight: Arena)

Signs with the word "Area Adventure" is seen on written on them.

Jai:( originaly just a normal free online game based off of a card game. That was the case for me untill one year ago.)

Raijin: What up mister Jai of Hearts ?

Kuri: You're late.

Jai turns around to see two young pair behind him.

Jai: Hey its not my fault i had class. now come on its a Friday we got enough time to do this.

Jai: (the guy thats all smile is Raijin hes somewhat problematic, i like him. The girl is our team leader Kuri. she might seemssomewhat depressed,but she is trully a messed up person. )

Jai: allot of people have turned up for the update huh.

Jai:( It used to be Just a simple game, untill a year ago players started gaining packages in real life. Each package contained a key to the arena. This key and a strong wifi connection allows our minds to somehow be transported here.)

multiple people can be seen entering the area.

holo-person: Hello may i have your ID.

A holo-person can be seen taking a girls ID. The ID turns red. the holo-person hands it back to girl.

holo-person: Next. Hello may i have your ID.

A pale young man in black hands his ID over, it is seen turning blue as people behind him looks in shock

Raijin: Wow thats how did that guy get blue ?

Kuri: The same way politics get there seat, connections. This new update is meant to make the game better for everyone but all it did was make everyone discriminate against one another.

Jai: Are you really that against a ranking system being used ?

Kuri: Its not the system, its the people that uses it as an excuse to belittle others.

The camera pans to the inside of the arena showing the stage.

A hologram of the game master appears on the stage.

GM: Ladies and Gentlemen welcome to the new and improve Cardfight Arena.
Now allot of you have been wondering what is this grandconest gonna be about.
Starting midnight the arena adventure will begin. Those who i determent to be suitable will become my Moderators, My Royal Guards.

4 large lcd screen shows diffrant section of the virtual world.

GM: I will choose one for each clan in the game to moderate each section based off there respective clans.

Jai: Wow he is really fun to see move.

Raijin: I'll say. I'm totally gonna win this and become a mod.

Kuri: Arn't you listening ? Its not about winning. Hes using this contest to choose his guards.

Multiple people makes there cameos.

GM: To all those participating I wish you the best of luck. In the meen time, go fight each other untill you drop.

To Be Continued.

Chapter 2

Spoiler

The Camera opens to a year ago, Jai is transported to arena for the first time.

Jai: Well now that the character creation is over. i am surprised you cant change your face, high't or complection much.

holo-person: Hello again Jai of Hearts.

Jai: Aaah, where did you come from !

holo-person: From the womb of 1's and 0's.

Jai: O great its programmed with humor. So where am I ?

holo-person: This is Enter-zone 1. A Enter-zone's are Log in and Respawn area.
From here is where your journey begins, but first.

A hologram of cards appear in-front of Jai.

holo-person: Build your deck.

Cray Vivire: Chapter 2.

The Camera opens in an arena section as Revenger, Desperate Dragon fires a breath attack on Machining Spark Hercules sending the player to the floor.

The dragon lands behind a pale-thin man with white hair dressed in black. He looks down on his opponent with an emotionless face.

The camera slowly zooms out revealing many people around the arena as the creatures fade away.

random person: Man hes amazing.

random person2: I know right ? he hasnt lost yet, how lucky is this guy ?

?:Ladies and Gentlemen this is now the most high profile section of the arena.
I'm your ring-announcer for the evening RA-4. Today in Less then 5 hours Lord Vidi has defeated a total of 9 people flawlessly, no miss-ride, so 5th damage and no misplay.

The camera shows Jai, Kuri, and Raijin in the crowed watching the fight.

Raijin steps on the rail preparing to jump into the arena section.

Kuri grabs Raijin and drags him back in.

Raijin: What was that for ?

Kuri: Look at our ID's

Kuri points to both the ID's on there chests.

Kuri: Where red, not even if we were yellow he wouldn't even glance at us.

Raijin: non of that matters.

Kuri: O really ? Look over there.

Kuri points to the entrance to that area section, showing people with red and yellow ID's being forced to turn around and walk away.

Kur: Blue's are the Highest players, they only fight each other. Yellow are the common people, there just a little less strong then blue.

Kuri when silent for a few seconds

Jai: And the red ?

Kuri: ...reds are nobody.

Jai: But weren't everybody suppose to start as red during the updates ?

Kuri: You forget the power of connections. Those with money, power and alliances.
They will always trample over those without as if there bugs on the floor.
Isn't that right Ravager ?

A man is seen leaning on a wall behind Kuri with a blue ID on her chest.

Ravager: O my, are you dissatisfied with my service ? Kuripoo

Jai: Ravager.

Raijin: Who that ?

Jai: A dealer of all things desirable on Arena.

Kuri: and one of the seven.

Raijin and Jai: That douch is a mod ?

Ravager: O my, I am not well liked am I ?
kuripoo whats wrong, why are you still a red ?
wouldn't you like to be a yellow ?

Kuri: I'm sorry i don't pay for what my skills can get me.

Ravager: Hmmm, too bad. What about you Jayjay ?
You might be an annoying little twat but i bet you could use a little more popularity.

Jai: Pass, after all it wouldn't be any fun if i dont hear you're excuses when I'm top.

Ravager: You really think thats possible ? Look around. I'm the only blue here.

A girl in high-class clothes can be seen looking at Ravager.

Ravager: The only other two are there in the arena section fighting. The blue class is made for those with the means to reach it. This game is no longer about skill or fun. It's about making the rich feel less depress and the poor feel less alone.

Cursed Spear Revenger, Diarmuid is seen striking down Beast Deity, Azure Dragon.

RA-4: Thats 10. 10 fighters have fallen at the hands or Lord Vidi. Is there anyone that can stand against him ?

Jai: You're right Ravager, its all about money to some.

Ravager is seen smiling.

Jai Climbs on the rail and jumps in the arena, leaving the group in shock.

Jai Points to Lord Vidi with a smirk on his face.

RA-4: Whats this ? A new challenger HAS JUST APPEARED!!!

To Be Continued.

Post some feed back and ideas you have

if you wanna be part of the story tell me.

and yata cant touch me

I see no reason to say 'no' ^_^ Just go on with that..it looks..well..promising :3 Regarding the use of actual members, I guess you can use my name :D About my character. . Use Hitsugaya from Bleach as reference :p

p/s: You might want to re-check for some typos and wrong usage of words "^_^

Quote from: Raijin on May 26, 2014, 10:50:07 PM

I see no reason to say 'no' ^_^ Just go on with that..it looks..well..promising :3 Regarding the use of actual members, I guess you can use my name :D About my character. . Use Hitsugaya from Bleach as reference :p

p/s: You might want to re-check for some typos and wrong usage of words "^_^

i might message you about it later. soon as exams are over this is a go.

Chapter 3

Spoiler

The camera opens in the Arena.

Vidi looks at Jai with an emotionless, un-surprised face.

Jai is seen pointing at Vidi with a smirk on his face, as a soda can his him on the head.

People in the crowd: Boo!, Get out of there you noob!, Hey i got him on the head!

The crowd trows trash at Jai as he tried to dodge all of them.

Raijin: O, that is harsh.

Jai: Since when do we have food ?!!

Ravager: Since the update apparently.

Jai: What possible reason would the they have for adding food ?!!!

Vidi exhales as the arena section lowers to the floor.

He turns around and heads towards the exit.

Ravager: What did he expect would happen ? No blue in the right mind would fight a red.

Just then a girl in the crowd jumps on the rail.

girl: You there, commoner!! I Sandra will Accept your challange.

Sandra leaps into the arena.

Jai tries to catch her but ends up on his back with sandra on his chest.

Raijin: Wow must be a leap year. huh ? Check out her ID!

Kuri: A blue ? Shes a blue.

Ravager: The High class girl is in Sandra, shes a real ace. Probably as strong as Vidi.

Sandra: O my you are cute for a commoner.

Jai: I also have trouble breathing at the moment.

Vidi is seen looking at Jai in the arena.

Gothic lolita Maid: Master is there something wrong ?

Vidi: Nothing.

Vidi walks away and the camera turns to Jai and sandra in the arena section as it rises.

RA-4: People today for the first time ever there will be a match between a red and a blue. In one corner we have Sandra, A multi-time tournament champion vs Jai of Hearts, another multi-tournament winner before the ranking system came online.

Both players sets there starting Vanguard Face down.

RA-4: While both are Different class ranking, there both extremely strong fighters.

Jai and Sandra are seen drawing.

RA-4: Will this match prove that class means nothing or will it only strengthen the newly implemented system.

The time for talk is over it, IT'S TIME TO CARDFIGHT!!!

Sandra and Jai: STAND UP, VAGUARD!!!

Both fighters revealed there cards as light fills two parts of the field.

Sandra: Broccolini Musketeer, Kirah.

Jai: Little Fighter, Cron.

Both units enter the arena in a dramatic fashion and takes battle.

Sandra: You wouldn't mind me taking the lead right ?

Jai: Not at all.

Sandra: Ride.

Sandra Rides Lily of the Valley Musketeer, Rebecca.

Jai: My go. Ride.

Jai rides Radiant Drummer, Mina. (7k)

Jai attack.

Sandra takes one damage.

Sandra: My go.

Sandra rides White Rose Musketeer, Alberto and calls Pansy Musketeer, Sylvia.

With Sylvia's skill she calls Water Lily Musketeer, Ruth to the other side of the field along with Tulip Musketeer, Mina.

Water Lilys and the vanguards attack hits attack hits.

First damage is a normal card, second is a critical trigger giving Jai's vanguard 5k.

Sylvia's attack is guarded.

Jai stands and draws.

He rides Radiant flautists, Aina (9k) and calls Radiant Eponymic Knight, Name (8k) and Radiant Dagger, Dirk.(7k)

Aina attacks Alberto, Jai checks a critical.

Jai: Aina's skill.

Jai sends Cron from behind Aina to the soul.

He checks the top card and call Radiant Huntgal.(9k)

Huntgal attacks but Sylvia intercepts.

Name attacks as well but is blocked with a 10k guard.

Sandra Rides Carnation Musketeer, Miraina.(11k)

and calls Black Lily Musketeer, Hermann and White Rose Musketeer, Alberto.

Alberto attacks but Jai guards.

Miraina attacks, sandra gets a critical.

Jai checks a draw, giving it to his vanguard.

Hermann attacks but is guarded.

Jai: Stand and draw.

Jai:( 4 damage, i need a comeback)

Jai rides Shining Lancer , The Radiant. (11k)

and calls Radiant Drummer, Mina behind huntgal.

Lancer attacks Maraina.

Jai: Limit Break, go.

Jai counter blasts 2 as all his front units gain +4k.

Sandra Guards with a 10k.

Jai gets a heal trigger giving the power to name.

Jai:(her defense is weakened)

Name's attack hits the vanguard.

Jai: Name's skills activates.

Jai sends Name to the soul and searches the top 7 cards of his deck.

Another Name is called from among them and gains +2k.

The second Name attacks but is blocked.

Huntgal attacks and it hits.

Jai: 4dmg Sandra: 5 dmg

Kuri: Hes hanging on quite nicely.

Raijin you say that like hes in trouble.

Sandra: Draws a card and gets a smile on her face.

Kuri: He might just be now.

Sandra: Bloom now defender of the bliss-filled forest and unsheathe your blade, Holly Musketeer, Elvira. Maraina's break ride skill.

Sandra counter blasts 1 card and retires Hermann and Mina.

She searches the top 6 cards of her deck and calls Dandelion Musketeer, Mirkka and
Cherry Blossom Musketeer, Augusto.

Sandra: limit break times 2.

Raijin: 21k and critical 3 ?

Sandra: Go Elvira and end this.

Sandra does a proud-ritchgirl laugh as Elvira leaps at Jai.

Jai: Not today you dont!

Jai trows down a perfect guard.

Sandra: My you are annoyingly thought to kill.

Sandra gets a heal giving all to Augusto.

Alberto's attack hits, unflipping one card.

Jai gets a draw giving the power to his vanguard.

Sandra: Fare the well, Jai.

Augusto attacks but Jai guards with a 10k and intercepts with Name.

The crowd grows silent, awaiting Jai's next move.

Raijin: Wow it got quiet all of a sudden.

Kuri: Thats because its possible were about to see a now blue get crowned.

Raijin: Jai ? How ?

Kuri: If Jai wins this they will make him a blue to lessen the rioting.

Raijin: Where gonna riot ? Heck yea!

Jai draws a card and looks pleasantly surprised.

Jai: I knew you would come. Mighty golden wolf, Howl as you enter the battle.
I RIDE RADIANT WOLF, GARMORE.

The crowd cheers Garmore's name.

Sandra: Is that your ace ? My he is Radiant.

Jai smiles you aint see nothing yet. I activate Garmore's ROYAL FLUSH!!

Sandra: Royal Flush ?

Jai: I can check the top 5 cards. If the total grade of all cards are 6 or more i can use the skill.

Jai gets a G3

then a G0

Another 0

A G1

A G3

Jai: Now Royal Flush skill.

Jai counter blast's 2 and sends Dirk to the soul.

He checks the top 5 cards of his deck and calls 3 gold paladin units to his open rears.

Jai: Garmore also gets a bonus. If a unit was called to the field if there is one with the same name as it on the field garmore gets a 5k bonus.

Garmore attacks, but sandra trows a pfg.

Jai gets no triggers.

Huntgal attacks and hits.

no trigger for sandra.

Aina attacks and it hits.

Raijin: Booya!!!

Sandra checks getting a heal trigger.

Raijin: Gosh, darnit !!! Why!!!?

Sandra stands and draws.

Sandra:Do you think fate would let someone of my class fall ?
Now for the Finale.

Elvira Attacks Garmore.

Jai checks, no heal.

The units disappears, the crowds dissipates.

People from crowd: I knew he couldn't win. Figures a blue wins. A reds should just stick to fighting other reds. She must have went easy on him.

Sandra Approaches Jai.

Sandra: Its's sad isn't it ? Only one day and there's already all this discrimination. Hey are you alright ?

Jai: No...that was one of the best high i ever got in a while !

Sandra: Uuh high.

Jai Grabs Sandra's hands.

Jai: Yes, the back and forth. Thought i was gonna lose but then i got garmore.
Thank you so much.

Sandra: My you are joy-full one.

MIDNIGHT.

GM: EVERYBODY ASLEEP GET UP!!!

Jai awakens as he sees he has fallen asleep with Sandra next to him, Raijin on Kuri's lap.

Kuri shoves him to the floor.

GM: Brave Fighters your journey is about to start.

Jai: About time.

Raijin: Heck yea, together we will take down whoever has the gull to stand in out way.

Kuri: I never told you guy this but, i first hated you two and planned on cutting you both up in your sleep.

....

Jai/Raijin: And now ?

Kuri: Now what ?

Sandra: You guys have room for one more ?

Raijin: Sure thing, honey.

Sandra: Don't call me honey.

Raijin: No problem babe.

GM: Get ready. Get set.

Jai and his team, among other eagerly awaits.

GM: O b-t-dubs everyone is ported to a separate area.

Jai: Say what now.

The are teleported away to the location of the game site.

To Be Continued in Phase 2: The Cray Games.

The Game Master is shown in his private room, drinking what appears to be wine.

Servant: Sir, is this the only way we can locate them ?

GM: Would you prefer we go and ask ? This is the best option, remember how long it took me to find you ? or some of the others ?

Servant: And it has nothing to do with the fact that you
loved the hunger games ?

GM: This is why you are the woman i love.

Servant: And yet you treat me like a mistress, you useless neet.

Chapter 3.5

Spoiler

The Camera opens in a futuristic like city as a young man with brown hair and a wide grin walks threw the market area.

Man: Someone stop that boy!!

A boy is seen running with a large piece of bread in his arms, passing the young man.

?: And here i thought today was gonna be another boring trip to the store.

The young man takes off with an amazing speed, jumping and running on a wall.

The young man lands in-front of the boy as he crashes in him like a brick wall and gets knocked down.

?: This wolf, this one right here always gets his pray.

Man: O thank you very much. This little street urchant has been stealing my bread for the past few weeks.

The man grabs the boy in a vice-grip like hold on his arm.

Man: With the war going on of all things we have to deal with thieves aswell.

A shocked expression falls on young mans face as if he has just received a revelation.

?: Sir, is this you're bread.

Man: Yes, from my store.

?: My how wonderfull. You just saved me a trip to the store little guy. Mind if i pay for the bread ?

The man and the boy have puzzled expressions on there faces.

The young man hands the bread man some money, the man released the boy and leaves.

?: Are you hungry little guy ?

The young man tries the give the boy a piece of his bread, but the boy only turns a cheek.

?: Ha, i remember what it was like. Living without a friends, family, a home. I've even lived in the wild almost all my childhood. But then someone helped me and so i made a promise to myself, that if i ever find another person in the same situation i was. I would help them.

The boy looks at the young man as if he was looking at an alien being.

The young man extends his right hand to the boy.

Garmore: My name is Garmore. Can you tell me yours ?

The boy extends his own hard to hold Garmore's.

?: My name is.....

Cray: Vivire Chapter 3.5 Vitam

Chapter 4

Spoiler

The Camera opens in a quiet blue sky as a bird flies and a man falls on top of it, wait what ?

Raijin: AAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!

Raijin, Jai, Kuri and Sandra can be seen falling from the sky.

Area Forum --> CFA --> Creative Works Proudly presents.

Cardfight Vivire: The Cray Games.

Jai:(looks like there's plenty of tree's down there. Maybe if i had a scythe i could stick to one of em, or maybe some gauntlet's with guns installed in em, or someone with a speak and stick me to a three, Or....?.)

Jai is safely on the ground.

Jai: Or i could land safely in a forest area.

A hologram screen appears in-front of him.

GM: Did everyone have a nice fall ?

Jai punches threw the hologram, his fist lands on a nearby tree.

GM:Now if all of you would please look at your deck case. Inside there one card, your starting vanguard from before you enter.
You will use the starter of the deck you have loaded before entering the tournament.

Kuri is shown in a dark and gloomy area.

You will use that starter to wear its armor and use its abilities. The rules are simple, this is an rpg style contest where you will battle one another along with many virtual creatures allong the way, in order to reach the mountain top.

A map opens in-front of Sandra who is located in a dessert like area.

Along the way you must battle and defeat as many creatures as you can in order to level up and gain cards of highgrade to transform.
the rest of the rules will be written in the instructions manual at the bottom of your screen, simply click your ID in-order to open the menu.

GM: Now to all fighters, MAY THE ODDS BE EVER IN YOUR FAVOR.

The screen disappears as the map remains with a red dot blinking on the mountain.

Sandra: Man now this is a twist. I mean if it was a straight forward cardfight tournament we would have all been on equal footing.

Kuri: The fact that he said all teams are dissolved means that he separated every and all personal that have been known to pair up.
which leaves everyone on there own, with no way of contacting one another.

Jai: It's a survival game plain and simple. We need to kill our opponents or be killed. If i could reach someone i know i could pair up with them. but how am i gonna find em.

The sound of a rustling bush is heard behind Jai.

As he turns around his cloths transform into the armor of Little Fighter, Cron.

A girl comes out shocked as her clothes transform into that of Girl Who Crossed the Gap.

The two stare at each other for a long few seconds, frozen with nervousness.

Jai: Umm...hi.

The girl lunges at Jai Knocking him to the ground.

Jai blocks her assault with his right hand in a defensive position, but the girl bites it.

Jai knocks the girl back, but she gets up and begins to run.

He gives chase to the female, with her in a impressive lead.

As she gains an even greater lead she is quickly stabs from the side by a Barcgal as an unknown fighter arrives.

Jai hides behind a tree and peeks at the situation.

The females fighters body vanishes leaving behind a card.

Jai:( So that's it, each time we beat a fighter we get a card. Allowing us to transform into stronger creatures. If, if i attack him now.)

Jai tries to move his legs but is unable to.

Jai: ( I can't move. Why can't i move ?)

The barcgal begins to bark as the man turns to Jai's direction.

He slowly begins to wall to Jai, but is attacked by an unknown creature and taken away.

Jai remains still on the ground, puzzled by his own expressions.

The camera zooms out on a tv screen in a room filled with my others showing many fighters from across.

Servant: I guess this is how you like getting off, you little sadist.

GM: O my is that what you think of me ? You gotta admit this is a good way for them to grow a little as people. Most of these people are gamer's, the no life stay at home type. To putt them in a situation they are not familiar with, let alone never imagined themselves in.

Servant: Will get you off in a way that your nightly internet time can never do.

GM: You do remember i own you right ?

The female servant pulls out a tapeplayer and presses play, the words " you do remember i own you right ?" comes out of the player.

Servant: I think the authorities would enjoy hearing whats on this tape.

GM: Please don't, you know I'm only joking. Come on we're childhood friends. Can't you take a joke ?

The Camera Zooms in on a tv screen, showing Kuri hiding in the shadows of a ruined area.

Kuri: I need to stay hidden and strike anyone that comes by. I'm glad a Nubatama user.

Girl: ahh please stop.

Kuri quickly moves and hides behind a wall near where a girl can be seen on the floor.

Four men surrounding her from each side with no way for her to leave.

Man 1: Well well looks like we sound ourselves a play mate. Get her up.

Kuri are you kidding me ? Here of all places there are people like that ?

one of the men holds the girl up and the other one grabs her face.

Man 1: Now whats your name sweety.

Girl:...

Man 1: Don't manna talk huh ? Don't worry we have a nice little something for that mouth of yours.

Kuri eyes grows in anger as she looks on.

The one that appears to lead the group transforms into normal clothes and begins to unzip his pants.

Kuri: That's it i don't care if i lose.

Just as Kuri is about to reveal herself the leader of the group begins to scream.

Man 2: Hey whats happening ?

The man holding the girl also begins to scream in pain both holding there crotches.

Girl: Now this is why I had the Master install some senses into the game.

The Girls voice changes to that of a man.

Girl/Man ?!: Don't worry it will all be over soon. I just want you to remember how you where banned and spread it around, ok ? <3

The men vanish leaving only there screams behind echoing.

Girl/Man: You can come out now.

Kuri shows herself to the Man...i mean girl, whatever.

Kuri: So this is your game. Gathering most lawbreakers in one place in order to clean up. Tell me how much of an influence do you have on the game master ? YATA THE CLEANER.

Yata shoots a smile at Kuri, while in the dark another fighter in a cloak is seen spying on both.

?: Looks like my HUNT will take a little while longer.
To Be Continued.

ok

this is a good story...you should continue it...:3

just know that its going to downplay the epic fights for a few chapters.

but thanks for the praise

Chapter 4.5

Spoiler

The Camera opens with the sounds of wings flapping in the air, a bird fields beside the screen.

This is a story about my life before, after and now.

Two young brown-haired children, one boy one girl can be seen playing together.

This is me and my brother as we play near our family's vacation home..

Every year we used to go and spend time together, leaving with smiles and fun memories.

Untill that year year.

The sky is shown going dark as fears winds begins to blow.

A cabin is shown, people can be heard moving inside.

Before a fears hurricane came from out of nowhere and...

The roof of the cabin rips form its body and flies to the sky.

changed everything.

Our parents managed to find a safe place for us, but at the cost of having no place for themselves.

My brother alone buried them near the tree they loved to sleep under, forever together.

As time passes out supplies get less and less, my brother decided to leave and go get help.

I was there alone for so long that, i didn't know if i would ever see another living person again.

Just as all hope was about to leave me the door opened.

?: Have you been all by yourself all this time ?

A woman clad in angelic attire came to save me.

It was like a sign from above, I was so happy, so happy i was saved.

But even that happiness came with sadness.

The girl can be seen eating and drinking.

?: is it any good ?

girl: Where's my brother ?

?: Brother ?

?: He told me he was gonna get help and then you came.

The woman goes silent as her eyes show one that is about to deliver a sad news.

?: Listen sweety...

She told me that no one came asking for help.

She came looking for me because she worked with me parents and knew where we were.

She didn't know that they were already gone, now i know my brother is gone too...

that is untill a two years later.

The girl can be seen a little taller and looking at a news paper.

My brother was found in the woods living with snowgals.

I was so happy that i fell to my knee's and thank God that i wasn't alone anymore.

With my newly formed connections with the angel feathers I was able to see him again.

Now 5 years later i once again visit him like i do every year.

Only this time im a full fledged Angel Feather Warrior.

A woman in angelic motif armor can be seen flying in the air.

She lands in a wide grass area full of dogs of different breeds, walking to the door and ringing the bell.

I can't wait to see the look on his dumb face.

A boy opens the door.

?: Hello. Can I help you ?

?: Who, who are you ?

Cardfight Vivire

Chapter 4.5

The Wings of Hope.

Chapter 5

Spoiler

The camera opens to a cloaked man moving swiftly in the shadows, covered in a cloak blending into the darkness.

Has he moves he spots Kuri as she hid behind a wall.

Hunter: Target set.

Cray Vivire

Chapter 5

We see a fighter walking in the forest, his clothes suddenly transform to armor.

fighter: Who's there ? Show yourself !

Jai can be seen hiding in the grass, frozen with nervous ness.

The fighter slowly backs , turns and runs from the area.

Jai: ( Man, im just a coward. Someone else is coming.)

A silhouette of a girl can be seen walking t words Jai's direction.

Jai:(A girl. Now's my chance. I mean how hard can a girl be ?)

Jai flashes back to a scene where Kuri has her foot on his head as he is kneeling on the floor.

Jai: (Maybe i should let this one pass ? Now i need to do this, in the name of all men this the world. I must dig into my male instinct's and...) ATTACK!!!

Jai leaps towards the girl, the screen fading to white leaving only a girlish scream.

meanwhile Kuri confronts the moderator Yata The Cleaner.

Yata: Well we had to take care of some of the trash that seeped back into arena

Kuri: How did they return ?

Yata: O you know they found someone who wormed there way to power.

The screen cuts to Ravager sneezing as he counts a load of money.

Kuri: So this means your all keeping a close eye on everyone ?

Yata: Ofcourse silly. <3

Kuri: ( Yata is one of the first mods. Originally we were pretty close, but that was before his status change and his umm ...transformation.)

Yata: Well, if we're done talk. I'm off to excessive force on more perverts <3

Kuri: Wait i have one question. What is this contest for ?

Yata: To find the new mod of-course, there's no other hidden agenda.<3

Kuri: If the Gamer Master cared who would be the authority, he wouldn't have modded a greedy low life.

The camera cuts to Ravager sneezing.

Yata: Is there something you wanted to say Kuri-chan ? <3 I know you arn't one to stay silent for long.

Kuri: This change, its too drastic. I just have this feeling that something is wrong, something bad is going to happen.

Yata walks to Kuri and taps her on the head.

Yata: ...Kuri dont worry about it. Just play the game and we will talk later.

Yata begins to float in the air.

Kuri: (It's amazing how they get even super human powers in this world. Gotta admit i wouldn't mind having that power.)

Yata: O and you're being stalked.

Hunter: She knows.

Two knives gets thrown at Kuri as they both hit.

Yata: That should keep her mind off of things.

Yata teleports away, Hunter in the form of Vermillion Gatekeeper.

Hunter: hmmp, substitution. A ninja user.

A log is seen on the floor with two knives stuck in its body.

Kuri leaps from the shadows in the form of Stealth Beast, Kuroko at Hunter, both clashing in a battle of knives vs kunai.

Hunter removed glove form his left hand as it turns blue, releasing an blue smoke.

Hunter: This hand of mine burns with an awesome power.

Hunter moves towards Kuri grabing her right hand with his left burning it.

Kuri's scream can be heard reaching the sky, she stabs Hunter as he backs off.

Kuri runs into the darkness.

Hunter: It's no good, once i get your scent i never forget it. Do you hear me girl ? I will find you.

Kuri runs in to forest in panic tripping and falling in the darkness.

Kuri:( How are we suppose win this ? When people like that are playing ?)

Kuri looks at her burned hand.

Kuri:( Shouldn't this still be hurting ? Come to think of it, i pulled of a substitution back there. Maybe there more to this game then meets the eye ? I must survive, I must find my friends. Because I know they will survive to find me.)

We are shown a futuristic city as a woman with angelic wings is shown walking towards the city, in her arms a passed out Jai.

GM: Yata, how goes the cleaning ?

Yata: All the obvious trash has been recycled.

GM: Good, keep me posted.

The GM stares at the monitor showing Jai in the arms of a woman with wings, Kuri setting in the darkness, Sandra killing lizard soldiers and Raijin in an area full of machines.

GM: i wonder how long it will take for them to notice that flow of time in this worlds.

The winged woman holding putts Jai down in a cave.

?:This should be a good place to hide.

She looks at Jai with a smile on her face.

?: Guess you're training can start later.

Raijin: Old man don't die.

Raijin is seen in a area full of metal walls holding a man in his arms.

Man: My hope, my dreams is now in your hands. Take it, take my machine.

The GM walks to a window showing a mansion at a mountain.

GM: Come brave fighters and show me who among you hold the spirit's of cray inside of you as i do.

TO BE CONTINUED...RIGHT AFTER THE TIME SKIP XD.

The Screen shows a female fighter climbing a mountain, she enters a dark cave.

Fighter: Wow its been 3 days. I think I'm the farthest one.

A sound of machinery can be heard in the cave.

Fighter: Is someone there ?

A man with a cyber body can be seen in the dark, its face covered with a shadow.

He opens his red eyes, they glow with lifeless light in them.

Fighter: What are you ?

Metal tentacles attack the woman, only the shadows vaguely shows whats happening to her.

The noise stops as she stands up, the metal man looking at her un-moved from his seat.

Fighter: Conversion complete.

Chapter 5.5

Spoiler

We open in a laboratory where a golden armor in the form of a wolf lies in a device.

A man is seen holding his arm on a golden armor, multiple charts are seen spiking up high on multiple screens.

Professor: Thats enough.

A woman with black marks under her eye walks towards the man.

Professor: Salutations, you got a new armor.

Garmore: Gee already ? It wasn't too long ago I got the last one.

Professor: Once we're done with the rest of the tests, you can try it on.

Garmore is seen walking in the streets of the Sanctuary.

Ahh, this takes me back. to the my first day back in the sanctuary.

We cut back to a very young Garmore with his sister many years ago.

Garmore: Stay here, I'll be back as soon as i can.

?: No, don't go.

I believe she was to young at the time to understand.

Our parent's gone, our lives in danger. Now me abandoning her.

I had no choice knowing winter was coming. And so i braved the road unknown.

Recalling every spot we passed to get here. But I was young and foolish.

Being so far from the sanctuary i got lost in the woods.

I spend days, weeks surviving alone. But with no survival knowledge at my side,

it was only a matter of time before i collapsed in the woods.

Young Garmore lies in the dirt as snow begins to fall, a creature slowly approaches him.

When i was at the brink of death, i was saved but the most unlikely of ally.

I awakened to find a wild snogal watching me with sharp eyes.

My heart stilled at that moment, untill i noticed 4 young pups eating fish.

And one fish infront of me. I look at the snowgal and notice a scar on her belly.

At that moment a buried memory in me awakens.

long ago my mother and father two military vets saved a snowgal.

She stays with us for our time, but unlimitly must be returned to the wild.

I slowly picked up the fish and begin to eat it.

I didn't like the mushy taste or the blood, but I ate it all.

In time I started draining the fish or there blood, eat fruits i see them eat, recall everything my parents ever told me about snogals.

Two years i lived with them, ate with them, bath with them.

They became my new family. But I still remembered my old family.

When i was able to find my way back to my sister she was gone.

That day i decided that i am gonna find my sister.

When my new mother passed i rallied my brothers and set of for the United Sanctuary, for my home, for my sister.

Piecing back together old memories I journeyed back home.

When i reached the Sanctuary it was all alien to me. The buildings the people,

everything changed so much.

It didn't take my brothers long to grab every fruit in sight, demolishing a melon cart.

Melon seller: Not My Mellon's !!!!

it didn't take long for the authorities to arrive. Still thinking like a beast i attacked them.

A young man in the crowd saw my take them down.

He comes at me with a wooden sword.

Me thinking only of attacking him didn't notice the stick untill in crashed on my head.

While i was groggy they cuffed and drag me to there station.

After a few interviews and speaking for the first time in many years to another human being i learned that my sister was alive an well.

Now in the education system of the Angels.

After so many years I was so happy to see her again, both of us in tears.

We stayed together for a month untill the young swordsman came to my home and gave me an offer.

Ahmes: Join the Royal Paladins, with your strength i know we can protect this world together.

Garmore is shown walking to his home in a wide grass field.

His many dogs run to him with joy.

So much has happened in my life, so much has changed and so much more to come.

Garmore opens the door to his home and enters.

Garmore: I'm back.

?: Welcome home brother

Garmore: Zeviel, what are you doing here ?!

Zeviel: O brother is that what you say to a sister that came from far to visit. Now Garmore what did I tell you the last time i was hear about picking up strays.

Garmore: But I didn't-

Zeviel: I was talking about him.

Zeviel points to the boy in the room.

?: ?

Cray Vivire

Chapter 5.5

Garmore, The Wolf King.

Depends...can I be in :D

Quote from: Ellinopoulo on May 27, 2014, 02:29:19 PM

Depends...can I be in :D

send me your info i will get back to you maybe later or tomorrow.

Chapter 6

Spoiler

We open in the Sanctuary section of the Area Adventure world as a group of three people are seen running.

Not far behind them a berserk Phantom Blaster Dragon approaches.

The dragon corners them in dead end, emphasis on the word dead.

Cherry: Alan you know what we have to do.

Alan: Right, it's for the good of the team.

They both grab the female member for there them and hold her.

Alan/Cherry: O great dragon please accept this virgin sacrifice and let us live.

Kat: What are you doing ?

Alan: I'm sorry Kat but this is survival of the fittest.

Cherry: it's true you look good in that Silver Thorn Assistant, Irina outfit, but we can always find a new replacement.

Kat: I will haunt you guys.

The dragon prepares to slash them to death with its mighty claws.

Jai: Hey, you guys do know we can't really die right ?

Jai appears on-top of a building wearing red armor on top, but with a pirate hat and boots.

Jai: IT'S JAI TIME !!!

He leaps from the building stabbing the dragon with his rapier in the eye.

Alan: I do believe we found a crazy person.

Jai falls hard to the ground as the dragon screams in agony, it retreats.

Jai: Now...how'ed you like...that.

He tries to get up but it's clear that he tool allot of damage.

Cherry: He lost his weapon, I GOT THIS !!!.

Cherry attacks Jai, but the young knight pulls a gun in-front of his face.

Cherry: What kind of knight has a gun.

Jai: An ex-pirate apparently.

Alan: Now hold, we can talk about this.

Kat: I say shoot him, then shoot him.

Jai: I have a better idea. Why don't you guys walk out of here.

Alan: really ? Because even if one of us can't fight.

Jai: The girl is leaving.

Alan: It's still two on one.

Jai point's behind himself, Alan side steps to see a winged woman on the building Jai was on.

Jai: O and shes at grade 3, I'm grade 2. But you're still grade 1 and if I'm not mistaken, so is he.

Alan looks at him with a glare, as Jai counter's with a confidant smile.

We see Jai and the woman see the two men walk away.

?: I told you you should stayed out if it.

Jai: Hey that girl needed a chance.

?: It seem's you have a weakness to the opposite sex, little cherry boy.

ONE WEEK AGO

We have a close up of Jai opening his eyes.

As we pull back we see a women sleeping on his chest.

A panicky look appears on his face, unknown of what had happen to let up to this moment.

The women opens her eyes and stares with sleepy eyes at him.

Jai: Hi.

?: Well hello there. You were something last night.

Jai: (Last night ?!)

?: You where a beast.

Jai: (A beast ?!!)

?: I was so scared but once i accepted it i understood my place. I hope you can take responsibility.

Jai: NO, MY WILDSIDE HAS FAILED ME.

Jai is clearly seen in a panicked state, but quickly clams down.

He remembers getting knocked out by the women in-front of him.

Jai: You knocked me out.

?: Aww you're no fun. I'm at grade one and you're at grade 0. Even if it was a head to head battle, you couldn't possibly defeat me. You my boy need some training.

Her name is Zara an angel feather user.

She's told me she wanted to help me because i reminded her of a puppy she once had.

Little that I know, I would later ow her so much.

Cardfight Vivire

Chapter 6

We open in the lava area where a Dragonic Overlord is seen burning many creatures.

Jaden: Yahoo, I love being a grade 3 user.

A young man with a red jacket is seen beside the dragon.

A group of men is seen hiding behind some rocks, spying on the Jaden.

Man 1: Man we can't beat this guy, look at that thing.

Kuri: Maybe you guy's should pay more attention to your surrounding.

Kuri in the form of Stealth Rogue of a Thousand Blades, Oborozakura slices two of the men.

Man 1: No my team.

Kuri raises her sword preparing to give him the killing blow.

Jaden: Wow, hold on now.

Kuri: What do you think you are doing ?

Jaden: The boss wanted us to bring one back for Maya remember ?

Kuri: And what happened to all the ones you where burning ?

Jaden: They came out of a little extra crispy.

Dragonic Overlord picks up the man and the group behind to walk.

A ship is seen with a small group of people inside and one angry face man sitting calmly inside on the center chair.

Female: Sir it seems the're returning, and they have a gift for Maya.

Abram: Maya let's go.

Maya: Yes sir.

Kuri: After my confrontation with Hunter, I knew i was weak.

So I vowed to get stronger. Joining this team was the only way.

Abram exits the ship and behind him a timed girl in the form of Silver Thorn Beast Tamer, Emil.

Dragonic Overlord lets the man he was holding fall to the ground.

The man looks around in panic as he is surrounded.

Dragonic Overlord steps on his legs, making him immobile.

Abram: Finish him.

Man1: No please no, MERCYYYYYYY!!!.

But this, this is disgraceful.

A card is seen glowing where the man was. Maya pics it up.

Abram: Is it something you can use ?

Maya: Yes, sir.

Maya transforms into the form of Silver Thorn Beast Tamer, Ana.

Abram: Good let's go.

Abram and Maya enter's the ship.

Kuri stares up in the sky, pondering.

Jaden: Hey Kuri, ya coming ?

Jai, Raijin, Sandra. Only thos that are strong and those that are united can survive this long. Please, please still be here.

Jai: So what did you say about me ? That I'm pathetic, a troll, an annoyance to the people around me ?

?: I'm so sorry, please.

Jai is seen with his sword to the neck of a man on the floor.

Zara: Who is he ?

Jai: An old friend, that annoyed me so much.

Zara: And so your solution is to torture him the words ? And here I thought you wouldn't take my advice.

Jai and Zara are seen walking away walking away with Jai holding a card.

Jai: Man I'm finally at grade 3. Tobad this dumb system didn't get my Garmore.

Zara: It appears this system mostly gives us cards we already have in our decks.

Jai: Yea but the best part is almost every card is usable in this system.

Zara: Hey you ever heard the legend of my card and Garmore ? There brother and sister who lost there parent's in a hurricane. Zeviel was then raised with the help of the angels, while Garmore lived in the wild. After he came back and became a knight, he adopted another orphan boy.

Zara opens Jai's palm and hands him a card.

Zara: During the war between the royal paladins and shadow paladins. Garmore when't to fight in the war. Leaving that boy in the care of the Fang Light Celestial, Zeviel.

Jai looks at the card seeing a warrior in red.

The name Radiant The Heart, The Infamous___ , the remaining words covered by Jai's thumb.

Zara: With her love, he grew up into a magnificent warrior. Fighting for those who no one cared to fight for.

Jai: He, just sounds like another lame shonen hero.

Zara: Yea, he kind of is.

We cut to a scene where a Stern Blauklugar is seen evading another machine, firing at it and destroying it.

Hunter: Sir it seems he's escaped again.

?: I'm not paying you to sit around for the trill or it.

Hunter: All he needs to do is land and I will do what i do best. But it won't be my fault is he never comes down.

We zoom in on the blau, inside we see a tired Raijin piloting it.

TO BE CONTINUED

Chapter 6.5

Spoiler

We open in Garmore's home as he is seen discussing something with Zeviel.

Gar: Please Zev, i can't leave him alone.

Zev: He's not my responsibility

Gar: You know they need me in the war. I can't leave him with anyone else. I think he lost his parents because of this war.

The young boy is seen eaves dropping on the conversation.

Zev: Fine, I will watch him until you get back.

Garmore walks to the young boy and tells him the news.

Gar: Do you understand.

The boy shakes his has in understatement.

Gar: Hey who knows, play your cards right you can be my new little brother.

?: Onii-chan.

Zev: I don't date children.

Gar: I'll be back soon.

I somehow knew, I knew that he wasn't coming back soon enough.

Six month's ago the war between the royal and shadow paladins ended.

Both clans decided to lead an army together, composed of creatures from all around cray.

While all this was going on I spend a comfortable life in the Sanctuary, training to be a knight and living with a beatifull woman.

We cut to an area of the sanctuary one year later, to a house where Zeviel knocking on a door inside.

Zev: Jair, get up its time for class.

Zeviel enters a messed up room full of cloths and books on the floor.

Zev: Get up.

Zev tosses o young man on the ground from his bed.

Get up its time for class.

Jair: Fine I'm up.

It's been two year's since Garmore left fight in the war.

For some reason i expected life to change, but everything's practically the same.

Guess we had nothing to worry about.

The sky turns cloudy in an instant.

Jair: Hmm must be rain.

What little remains of warrior's gather in the Healer Sanctum, to train among the healer's.

Let me tell one thing about living in an area mostly full of female warriors to train with, it is a heavenly hell.

So my life became on of training with friends and enjoying the piece we had...while it stood.

As Jair is seen walking with someone, an emergency patient is seeing being rushed with grate speed to surgery.

His eyes widens as they pass by, Jair turns and runs with great speed behind the floating bed cried by angels.

Jair: NO, no this can't be.

Jair makes it to the surgery room's door but is unable to enter, behind him lands a tearful Zeviel.

Zev: During the war with, what ever it is they fought. It...wiped out so many lives. Aiming for the leaders of the royal paladins, the shadow paladins and the kagero. Our forces retreated.

Zev begins to tear up more as Jair comfort's her.

Zev: I already lost him once. I can't...

Jair: He will live Zeviel.

Cray Vivire

Chapter 6.5

The ties of life.

Chapter 7

Spoiler

We open where we left of with Raijin piloting the Stern Blauklugar, his eyes barely able to stay open.

As he is about to close his eyes the alarm goes off.

Raijin: Another one ?

A pair of Grosse Baer attacks him from behind.

Raijin takes evasive action, dodging both shots and fires back destroying both Bear's

Something fires from the ground at Raijin.

Raijin: On the ground. There.

A Gattlingraizer is seen firing at Raijin, but he dodges and fires back destroying it.

Raijin: I don't know how much longer I can last like this. Maybe I should...

A flashback showing Jai and Kuri is seen.

I should just give up.

Cray Vivire

Chapter 7

Abram: When you told me you could get me one of the most powerfull machines in all of Cray. I took no time transferring the money to you.

Ravager is seen on a giant screen.

Ravager: Well I'm sorry it's not my fault that someone stole the stern.
Never the less I am a man of my word. I shall send you a machine and a new team member. All for free of-course.

Abram: Very well, I gratingly accept your offer. Thank you for your time.

Ravager: Not a problem.

The screen shuts off.

Ravager: Stupid gamer. Spending so much money on something he can't even hold in the real world. Hmm, I wonder how that noob got a hold of the stern in the first place ?

We go back to the ship.

Kuri: You can't trust him you know ?

Abram: I don't Ravager's trust, all i need is his supply. He might be a terrible human being, but he is a trust-wordy business man.

Kuri is clearly upset with Abram's actions, but remain's silent.

Jaden: Man this is boring huh ? I mean here I thought we were just gonna crush everyone, not worm our way to the top.

Jaden closes in on Kuri to whisper something in her ear, he then leaves with Kuri showing an unchanged face.

Raijin: So tired.

Raijin Flashes back to the day Arena Adventure began, landing in an area full of metal like a factory.

Raijin: Wow, this is wicked. No gravity too. Guy's how awesome is... ?

Raijin looks around seeing no one in the area.

Raijin: O right its just me.

a tentacle sneak's up on on Raijin as he transforms taking the form of Transmigrating Evolution, Miraioh.

Raijin: Ahh, no this is the least manly way to die!!!

From the shadows appear Screamin' and Dancin' Announcer, Shout.

Raijin Aaaaaaa, no not there. No,no,DIE!!!

Raijin fires at Shout, blowing him up.

Raijin: Ewww now hes all over me.

Man: You, boy.

An old man is seen calling to Raijin, waving at him to come over.

Man: Do you desire great power.

Raijin: And get my uncle killed. No thank you.

The man drags Rajiin by his arm.

Raijin: Hey what are... ? Whoa.

In the next room stands a Giant Stern Blaukluger.

man: There are dangerous people after this machine. With it you will have amazing power, enough to stand against anyone that threatens you...or your friends.

The float in the zero gravity all the way to the cockpit.

Man: Take it, and find them.

A shot is fired hitting the oldman as he falls into Raijin's arms.

Raijin: No!!!.

A man in black is seen entering the room as the oldman pushes Raijin into the armor.

man: Go, go and unite... with those that stand by you.

Raijin: wait !!!

The cockpit closes as the stern activates.

Raijin is clearly dis-trout as tries hover in the machine.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BnaC0RgEPCw

Raijin: Oldman, I might not know why you wanted me to have this machine, but...

The light in the sterns eyes turn on.

Raijin: I will PROTECT IT !!!.

Stern takes off as a hatch opens revealing it to be in a space station close to the planets Suface.

Man in black: Are you sure that was wise, STT Mystic ?

STT Mystic: O vlad, what kind of mods would we be if we let ravager get away with his plans ?

We return to the present as Raijin closes his eyes, the stern begins to fall in the forest.

Jai: Look!!

Zara: Is that a Stern Blauklugar ? Why would it be falling ?

Jai: (This feeling I have, what is it ?)

Hunter: Abram, The eagle has landed.

To Be Continued.

wow no one else want to assist ?

just two people ?

Chapter 7.5

Spoiler

We open threw the eyes of someone waking up from a hospital bed.

He tries to get up but struggles too do so, using the IV holder for support.

The man begins to slowly walk in pain to the door. He opens it and walks to the other side.

Outside he sees Jair and Zeviel both asleep next to one another.

He list's his head allowing us to see the reflection of Garmore.

He takes some time to look at himself, seeing how much damaged he has suffered .

He then looks at his sister and his ward, how they both sleep with worried expressions on there faces.

He smiles thinking to himself "They're gonna be pretty mad at me soon".

Slowly he begins to walk to the outside door vanishing into the dark.

Come morning we see Jair slowly opens his eyes. He get's up cautions of Zeviel next to him, he walks into Garmore's room.

Jair: Gar!

He quickly moves to the nurse's station asking where his friend is.

The Nurses quickly head towards the monitor room. On screen they see Garmore leaving the hospital.

Both Jair and Zeviel begin to leave.

Jair: Any clue where he's going.

Zev: I'm guessing you don' ether.

A few of the knights in angel in training are seen in-front of the hospital with a news paper in hand.

On it states that there will be a press conference addressing every living person in the Sanctuary.

Aina: And its at noon today. We thought since no one has seen you go home since yesterday, you guys must still be here.

Jai: It's in two hours. Thanks guys.

Both Jai and zeviel take off.

We cut to a wide open area full of people from around the sanctuary with a man covered in a cloak walking out on a balcony high above.

Gar: Citizen's of the United Sanctuary, today I bring you the worse kind of news i can.

Day's ago an army composed of every nation in Cray lead by both the Royal Paladins and the Shadow Paladins, engaged the most dangerous foe that has ever appeared.

During the battle the leaders of both paladin factions as well as the kagero's where up-ducted by out foe's along with a majority of there clansmen, including out own king.

Look up, Look at our dark sky's. This is only the beginning. Soon our ground will dry up, our crops will wither and die, our people will be captured and transformed into a weapon for our enemies.

Unless we stop this here and now.

Garmore removes his cloak to show that he is wearing a golden armor with a wolf like appearance.

Gar: This is only one of our new hope, sacred armors hidden away long ago. These armor will choose there own wielders who will become leaders in my new army, THE GOLD PALADINS !!!

I here by ask the remaining soldiers of the royal paladins to join me in my quest to liberate our fellow knight's from captivity.

And I also ask that those of the shadow paladins to please join us in out fight for our comrades.

Those who join is will receive a pardon for there past crimes against the Sanctuary.

Now who will join my cause ?

Cray Vivire

Chapter 7.5 A GOLDEN ARMY.

Chapter 8

Spoiler

We open in the forest area where the stern has crashed.

Jai: I don't see anyone around.

Zara: Of Course you don't, any decent person that hiding and waiting is the best option.

Jai: But can't we take it for ourselves ? With that kind of firepower...

Zara: We would be freaking huge targets. Now sit down and be quiet.

Hunter: I have a better idea. Why don't the two of you get use slowly and hand over your card ?

The Original Cardfight-wiki.ru Fan fiction

Cray Vivire

Chapter 8

Jai and Zara looked at each other, turned and leaped backwards away from hunter who is not in-front of them.

Jai: Now i don't know about you Zara, but i like our odds.

Hunter: And that would be ?

Behind Hunter emerges a Demon World Marquis, Amon from the woods.

Both Jai and Zara look at it with unchanged faces.

Zara: Odds still seems in our favor little man.

Jai: Hey am I the only one wondering how he has a crossbow ?

Hunter: Made it myself.

Jai: Wow that is really cool.

Hunter: You think so ?

Jai charger at Hunter taking the from of Shining Lancer , The Radiant and Zara at amon taking the from of Fang Light Celestial, Zeviel.

Zara: Eat Trident you ugly s.o.b.

Hunter tries to shoot his crossbow at Jai, but the string breaks.

Hunter: Piece of crap.

He tosses the crossbow aside and takes a battle stands.

Jai spear's him in the legs making him knee to the ground screaming in pain.

Jai: don't feel bad, same thing happened to Ned Stark. Now you have any final words ?

Hunter: Yes, what did you mention about odds ?

Jai: Say wut now ?

Abram: Attention male and female fighter duo, place lay down your arms and surrender. If you do now comply we will be forced to open fire.

Jai: There are spaceships in ... ? Why do i still get surprised by this game ?

We see Abram in his ship repeating his message as a shocked Kuri looks on.

Kuri: Jai, you're still here ?

Jai: What do we do ?

Zara lays down her cards and reverts back to her normal form.

Zara: We play by there rules, for now.

We see a bunch of men attempting to open the stern in many forms of many units.

Man: It's no good. We are unable to open it.

We see Abram in his chair on-board his ship talking to his men outside via video call.

Abram: I see, then pick it up with your dragons and bring it inside. hmm ? Jaden.

Jaden: Sir.

Abram: Bring our two guests to the dinning hall. I believe they could use some food.

We see Jaden in the prison ward with several men opening the door to Jai and Zara's cells.

Jaden: The Captain wants to see you two.

Zara: Hands off.

Zara and Jai enters a room with a table full of food and drink.

Abram: Welcome, please sit down and enjoy the refreshments.

Zara: And what makes you think we would accept anything you have to offer.

Abram: Your friend there seems to disagree with you.

We see Jai shoving food down his throat with no hesitation.

Jai: what ? I'm not questioning anything about this game anymore.

Abram: It's unusually rare to see one, let alone a pair of two fighters still on there own. But you two have survived long enough to prove that you are great fighters. But there is so much you can do all by yourselves.

Jai: And you want us to join you ?

Abram: Smart man. The current law in cardfight Arena care only for there own self interests,Proving that the game of no longer a place for the free and the happy, but the rich and envious. But together we can remove the rotten Karma that has infested Arena that very day they decided to install the ranking system.

Abram walks to where Jai and Zara sits, he extends his arm to Zara.

Abram: Join me in reincarnating the way people see our game. Ones i become a mod i will help those who helped me reach the same power, until we outnumber ever the seven.

....

Zara: Jai, you heard enough ?

Jai: I there say i have.

Zara: Shall we give him our answer.

Jai: Let's.

Both Jai and Zara stand up and transform, revealing to have hidden cards on themselves.

Jai taking the form of Incandescent Lion, Blond Ezel and Zara that of Prophecy Celestial, Ramiel.

Zara grabs Abram and sets her blade on his throat.

Jaden, Hunter and Maya, allong with many men enters the room pointing there arms at the duo as they hide behind Abram.

Jai: Looks like we just entered the, DANGER ZONE.

Kuri is at the door looking inside and pondering what she can do.

Abram: A simple no would have been enough for me to let you go.

Zara: But this is so much more exiting.

Jai: There a bunch of grade one's and zero's they can't do anything to us.

Hunter: O really ? You trap'ed in a tiny room with no other way out. Between you and the door about two other grade 3 user.
Now add all those useless grade one's and zero's.

We get a look at both parties as they stare off.

Hunter: Now What should we do with the two of you ?

Kuri: You're gonna let em go.

Kuri stand's holding a blade to Maya's throat.

Kuri: Or the boss' play thing loses her head.

Hunter: What do you think you're doing ? You think we're gonna let them and you go because of on little girl ?

Abram: Hunter wait. Do what they say

Hunter: What ?

Abram: Do as i say or you won't get paid !

A wide grin appears on hunter's face.

Hunter:...you already transferred the cash.

Hunter transforms into Blade Wing Reijy and tries to attack Kuri.

Jaden taking the form of Dragon Monk, Goku stabs him in the back.

Hunter: You little !

Jaden: Should have followed orders like a good merc and use less mouth.

Hunter: You...will...pay.

Hunter disappears leaving a card behind. Jaden picks up the card and begins to smell.

Jaden: Now this is a nice get. Hey Kuri, where were you gonna go after this ? I mean you can't hide in the woods or anything.
With this ship be kind find you almost anywhere around here.

Kuri: I, would have thought of something.

Jaden: HA, you just wanted to save your boyfriend so you acted without thinking.

Kuri: You think that's my boyfriend.

Jai: Ouch my heart.

Jaden: Fine then, you leave me no choice.

Jaden points his spear at Kuri, who still holds Maya captive.

TO BE CONTINUED

Chapter 8.5

Spoiler

We open in the training area next the sanctum where the angels and the knights train as Jair fights an unknown person, knocking him to the floor.

Jair: Next.

Everyone looks around, but non of them wants to spar with him.

It's been months since Garmore left with his Gold Paladins, now lead by a new knight with golden hair like a lion.

Then one by one more forces from each section of the Sanctuary where send to battle, leaving only the youngest warriors to train and the oldest warriors to instruct them.

Name: Man why does he look so mad today ?

Aina: Well his wife left him yesterday.

Name: Right the angels where the last one to leave. No wonder hes so...

Aina: Unbalanced ?

Name: I was gonna say upset.

We see Jair toss another warrior to the ground.

Name: But unbalanced seems to fit.

Jair: Now I'm ready for swords.

Every close to the training field backs up as Jair unseats a sword.

We zoom out in the distance to see an man next to a young female.

Arthuria: Father why would you would you wan't me to take them ?

Pendragon: They are the future, the Child from the Name clan Joseph Name, Aina of music armament corps and The young knight with a sea of potential Jair.

Arthuria: A pampered child, an elf and a tempered child. This will be my army ?

Pendragon: Don't forget yourself, my narcissistic daughter. Every leader has to start from somewhere.

We see Jair, Aina and Name at the front-gate of the Sanctuary.

Arthuria: Thank you all for meeting me here, I am Arthuria and I will be your leader for this mission. As you may know All of our main forces are engaged in a war against our unknown foe leaving a great portion of our nation virtually undefended.
That includes the Sacred Volt.

Aina: Whats the Sacred Volt ?

Arthuria: Tell me first how much you know about the Sacred Beast Armor's ?

Everyone remains silent.

Arthuria: *signs* Figures.

Jair: In the middle of the United Sanctuary and Dragon Empire there is an almost endless dungeon filled with many many armaments that can not be used, but the truth is they must choose there own wielders.

Arthuria: Correct. There have been sightings or thieves heading there. Our mission is to capture them.

We see a glimpse of the thieves with demon like appearance walking in a ruined area, in one of there sacks an egg.

Arthuria: Do you all except this mission ?

Cray Vivire

Chapter 8.5

Dawn of Radiance

The end...

We see a mansion on-top a mountain with a male elf with pale skin looking outside threw a window.

...for now

Just have 3 main characters and random side-characters with random names from several anime?I dunnp

truth be told i kinda wanted this to be, i dunno a bonding experience for area.
then again less characters less time needed to get all there approval on certian things.

Chapter 9

Spoiler

We open to a black colored robot flying in the sky, we see inside Ravager on a tv screen.

Ravager: Do you understand your mission ? You are to help Abram's team get to the goal.
Once you reached the goal you are to remport back to me.

Pilot:...

We see the black colored robot fly off into the blue sky.

Cray Vivire

Chapter 9

We return to Abram's ship where Jai and Zara hold Abram hostage, while Kuri also holds Maya hostage.

Jaden pointing his spear at Kuri shoots her a glare.

Jaden: You really are hopeless huh. No idea, no rationality. All you wan't to do is fight for him.

He said pointing the speak at Jai.

Kuri: Yea.

Jaden: O well. Abram.

Jaden turn's to look at Abram.

Jaden: I quit !

Jaden tosses the spear hitting Abram in the chest.

He grabs a walky-talky from his side and sets it to hes mouth.

Jaden: Attention all crew member, it's danga zone time !!!

Suddenly multiple crew members strike one another down.

Kuri: Jaden.

Jaden: Don't get me wrong i needed to do this sooner or later.

He said shooting Kuri a jubilus smile.

Both Jai and Zara stand stunned, unknown to what is currently happening.

Jai: What the heck is going on ?

We flashback to Jaden whispering into Kuri's ear.

Jaden: Meet me in the hanger at 8.

Kuri enters the hanger area of the shop which holds multiple robot like machines.

Jaden: you like em ? There all different machines the Captain bought from Ravager.
It's not a bad idea you know ? Seeing how this isn't a cardgame the guy with the biggest guns always win.

Kuri: Why did you call me here Jaden.

Jaden: Kuri, come on its me. Why can't you call me Jay ?

Kuri:...

Jaden: O right, you already have a Jay.

Kuri:...

Jaden: See Iiiiii always hated our so-called leader. He always sends everyone else to there death's. If someone weakness there opponents enough he kills them instead, taking everything for himself.

Kuri: Then how are you so strong.

Jaden: I was already strong when he found me. The thing i hate the most is he uses the people he's spouse help. The men are his personal maids, while the women...his toys.

Kuri: You want me to help you bring him down.

Jaden: Eeeeh, wrong.

We return to the present.

Jaden: All right my matey's. This ship is now under the rule of the not cute,flat-chested, un-girly like Capt.Kuri !!!

Kuri: I will murder you in your sleep.

Jaden: Did i mention she's a yandere folks ?

Abram is on the floor crawling.

Abram: You little snot's, you will rule the day you messed with me. DO YOU HEAR ME.

Maya kick's Abram in his wound.

Maya: Shut up and die you perverted old man.

Everyone else: What a personality change.

Maya: Jaaay.

Jai: Who me ?

Maya runs into the arms of Jaden.

Maya: I was so worried that you would get hurt.

Jaden: Dummy, I told you i would save you.

Everyone: Awww.

Jai: Wait, anyone else suddenly feel weaker ?

We see Abram on the floor slowly transforming.

Abram: Kill you, KILL...YOU...ALL.

Jaden: O nerdz, we need to get him outside !!!!

Zara tries to stab Abram, but the blade will not penetrate no matter how much she forces it.

Zara: We should get him outside.

We see everyone that was in the room carry a slowly transforming blob of flesh.

Jai: Why is he taking so long to change.

Kuri: Because if he changes in here he would take out the ship with him and his only solid ground for few hundred feet.

They take Abram to the hanger and back away from him.

Abram transforms into Galactic Beast, Zeal.

Zara: No wonder we got so weak. He's draining us !!

Abram: Ahhhhhh!!!

Kuri: Attack !!!

Everyone attacks Abram doing almost no damage.

We see Maya pauses for one costly second.

Abram: Maya !!!!

Abram prepares to fire an energy beam from his face when suddenly Jai and Jaden stabs him in the face.

Jaden: Nice going Jai.

Jai: You two Jaden.

FEEL THAT BROMANCE.

Abram gets back up preparing to fire.

Everyone trying to fight but are visibly to weakened to stand.

Jai: Nice knowing you bro.

Jaden: And you too man.

FEEL THAT BROMANCE.

As Abram is about to fire his beam, another beam of light fire threw him killing him.

Everyone turns to see the Stern activated.

Raijin: The power of bromance, HAS REVITALIZED ME !!!!!*faint's*

We move to the sick bay where we see Raijin waking up and next to his bed stands Jai and Kuri.

Jai: Welcome back to the world of the living.

Raijin: Hey guy's, I had the weirdest dream and you where in it, and you, and you, and you.

He say's pointing at everyone in the room.

Raijin: What happened ?

Kuri: It's a long story.

The piece is quickly broken by an announcement alert.

Announcer: Attention, attention. Capt.Kuri please report to the main deck immediately.

Kuri: Now what ? What's wrong ?

Female: It's a mobile suit, close by.

Kuri: It must be the machine Ravager send over.
Open communications. Attention pilot i am vice capt.Kuri, can you respond.

?: I was ordered to only make contact with Abram.

We hear a machine like voice.

Kuri: He's currently entertaining female guests. You will have to talk to me.

?:..I will only talk to Abram.

Kuri: Listen to me. If you do not land your suit we will consider you hostile and open fire.

?...very well.

Female: Communications have been cut.

Kuri: Do we have anyone that can pilot those suits ?

Jaden: Only one of them still works. The rest are too damaged beyond repair.
However we where able to upgrade the new blau we got and best of all we have an experienced pilot onboard.

Kuri: No I won't send Raijin into battle.

Raijin: Then it's a good thing you don't have to.

Both Jai, Zara and Raijin enter the room.

Kuri: Well I object.

Raijin: OVERRULED !!! Even halve dead I'm a better pilot then anyone in this ship, and your telling me to sit back ? Hell no Cap.

Kuri:...fine. Ensign Raijin get to your station.

Raijin: Ensign ? *he said with a smile on his face*

We see Raijin getting into an upgraded Blau as the rest look on at a screen.

Female: It's here.

Kuri: Raijin !!!

Raijin: You got it !!! GALAXY BLAUKLUGAR, TAKING OFF.

We see the galaxy powering up and launching.

Raijin: Woohooo.

TO BE EPIC

Chapter 9.5

Spoiler

Chapter

Spoiler

exams are over (untill a redo on monday, stupid educators who cant make a good exam)

im gonna work on chapter one.

Omake's
1

Spoiler

Cray Vivire Omake 1

The red warrior is seen walking past a fortune teller.

Teller: Young man would you give me a moment ?

RW: You talking to me ?

Teller: How would you like me to tell your fortune ?

RW: No thanks.

Teller: But wouldn't you like to defeat the angels tomorrow ?

The warrior stops in his tracks and pause for a moment.

RW: No thanks.

Teller: Remember to watch that dog poop in the corner.

The warrior leaves as a minute passes and he returns, dragging his feat on the floor.

RW: Ok how ?

Teller: Did i know ? Gee, could it be i can see the future ?

2

Spoiler

Cardfight Vivire Omake 2.

We open on dying planet as two blue skinned people, one man and one woman are seen near a rocket.

Inside the rocket is a young infant boy.

Father: goodbye my son, my hopes and dreams travel with you with you.

The rocket takes off into the sky leaving the planet.

Mother: He will be an outcast. They'll kill him.

Father: No, he will be a god to them.

The flash forward to the baby as a blue skinned adult on a fishing boat.

We see him saving people from an oil rig.

Shinning Lady: How do you find someone thats been hiding his whole live. For some he was a guardian angel, for others a ghost who never fit in.

Father: You will give the people of Cray something to strive for. In time you will help them accomplish wonders.

We see Mr.Invincible take his first flight, insert them song.

Cosmo Lord: You believe your son is safe ? I WILL FIND HIM !!!.

Dananananaaaanaaaana dananana bababababababuuuuuuuuuu.

Mr.Invincible: My father believed if the world found out what i really was, it'll reject. He was convinced that the world wasnt ready. What do you think ?

He see flashes of the upcoming fights.

Shinning lady: What does the I stand for ?

Mr.Invincible: What I ?

Shinning Lady: The one on your chest.

Mr.Inivincible: This isn't an I, it's my natural skin.

We see flashes of Mr invincible punching cosmo lord.

Man Of Invincibility

In threaders Now.

Also in IMAX and 3D

3

Spoiler

Cray Vivire Omake 3

we open to the Fortune telling from Omake 1 sitting at her regular station.

Jair: You tricked me !!!

Hours earlier at the training ground Crimson Drive, Aphrodite is seen taunting Jair.

Dite: Ha, do you believe a weakling like you can best me ?

Spectators: Is he crazy picking a fight with Aphrodite.
That guy must have a death wish.

Shanks: Jair once she kills you can i live with Zeviel ?

Jair: Go to hell, shanks !!!

(Side note: Shanks is Radiant Adventurer, Shanks. Who Jai used his form ealier on)

Judge: Begin.

Both take there battle stances as they leer at each other with piercing eyes.

Jair:( This is hand to hand combat. I should have the advantage since she's mostly a magic user. And I know the future.)

Jair Charges at Aphrodite, dodging her moves as if he knows what shes gonna trow before she trows it.

She tries to hit Jair in the chest but he grabs her arm and tosses her over his shoulder.

As the dust settle on Jair we see him on top of Ahprodite with a smile... and groping her breast as she blushes in confusion.

Teller: And ?

Jair: Every move you thought me ended in me groping her. I'm probably marked as a pervert now because of you.

Teller: Hmm, tell me how she acts the next day.

Jair: What ?

Teller: Come back tomorrow and tell me how she acts thwarts you.

Jair is clearly mad at the fortune teller, but decides to walk away.

THE NEXT DAY.

Teller: Ahh good evening. How are you today ?

Jair: How is that possible ? She was extremely nice to men, in a kinda tsundere type way. She even wanted me to call her dite. How is that possible ?

Teller: Do you doubt me now ?

Jair: How can i be sure this isn't a trick ?

Teller: Really ? Let me check my crystal ball. Ahh, ooooo, aaaaahh.

The crystal ball sines showing the tellers leg pressing a button.

Teller: Do you know of Crimson Impact, Metatron

Jair: Yes, commanding officer of Crimson Nursewind

Teller: She's not to happy with you, for a better word "seduced" one of her comrades. Shes coming for you. Warrior ?

We flash to Jair in his room writing his Will.

4

Spoiler

Dat ending XD...also I'm really not that serious XD Other than that..it looks pretty good so far
*P.S. can that be a real thing please?*

Quote from: Ellinopoulo on May 28, 2014, 02:01:29 PM

Dat ending XD...also I'm really not that serious XD Other than that..it looks pretty good so far
*P.S. can that be a real thing please?*

i made you the smrt seriouse and yandara one.

just go with it man. chapter 2 might be up tomorrow since i already planed what its gonna be about.

Quote from: "infamous" Jai Of Hearts on May 28, 2014, 01:53:50 PM

The Camera opens with the word sign "1 year ago"

What camera?

Quote from: FTLol on May 28, 2014, 07:30:07 PM

Quote from: "infamous" Jai Of Hearts on May 28, 2014, 01:53:50 PM
The Camera opens with the word sign "1 year ago"

What camera?

shhh we're not suppose to talk about that.

anyway people tell me if you like it, what you like, and if you are ready for chapter 2 its already done. chapter 3 will take a little more time for me to do, but i might also release it tomorrow.

Quote from: FTLol on May 28, 2014, 07:30:07 PM

Quote from: "infamous" Jai Of Hearts on May 28, 2014, 01:53:50 PM
The Camera opens with the word sign "1 year ago"

What camera?

security camera xD

Quote from: Toshiki Kai "Я" on May 28, 2014, 10:50:40 PM

Quote from: FTLol on May 28, 2014, 07:30:07 PM
Quote from: "infamous" Jai Of Hearts on May 28, 2014, 01:53:50 PM
The Camera opens with the word sign "1 year ago"

What camera?

security camera xD

more like hidden camera.

The Camera opens to a year ago, Jai is transported to arena for the first time.

Jai: Well now that the character creation is over. i am surprised you cant change your face, high't or complection much.

holo-person: Hello again Jai of Hearts.

Jai: Aaah, where did you come from !

holo-person: From the womb of 1's and 0's.

Jai: O great its programmed with humor. So where am I ?

holo-person: This is Enter-zone 1. A Enter-zone's are Log in and Respawn area.
From here is where your journey begins, but first.

A hologram of cards appear in-front of Jai.

holo-person: Build your deck.

Cray Vivire: Chapter 2.

The Camera opens in an arena section as Revenger, Desperate Dragon fires a breath attack on Machining Spark Hercules sending the player to the floor.

The dragon lands behind a pale-thin man with white hair dressed in black. He looks down on his opponent with an emotionless face.

The camera slowly zooms out revealing many people around the arena as the creatures fade away.

random person: Man hes amazing.

random person2: I know right ? he hasnt lost yet, how lucky is this guy ?

?:Ladies and Gentlemen this is now the most high profile section of the arena.
I'm your ring-announcer for the evening RA-4. Today in Less then 5 hours Lord Vidi has defeated a total of 9 people flawlessly, no miss-ride, so 5th damage and no misplay.

The camera shows Jai, Kuri, and Raijin in the crowed watching the fight.

Raijin steps on the rail preparing to jump into the arena section.

Kuri grabs Raijin and drags him back in.

Raijin: What was that for ?

Kuri: Look at our ID's

Kuri points to both the ID's on there chests.

Kuri: Where red, not even if we were yellow he wouldn't even glance at us.

Raijin: non of that matters.

Kuri: O really ? Look over there.

Kuri points to the entrance to that area section, showing people with red and yellow ID's being forced to turn around and walk away.

Kur: Blue's are the Highest players, they only fight each other. Yellow are the common people, there just a little less strong then blue.

Kuri when silent for a few seconds

Jai: And the red ?

Kuri: ...reds are nobody.

Jai: But weren't everybody suppose to start as red during the updates ?

Kuri: You forget the power of connections. Those with money, power and alliances.
They will always trample over those without as if there bugs on the floor.
Isn't that right Ravager ?

A man is seen leaning on a wall behind Kuri with a blue ID on her chest.

Ravager: O my, are you dissatisfied with my service ? Kuripoo

Jai: Ravager.

Raijin: Who that ?

Jai: A dealer of all things desirable on Arena.

Kuri: and one of the seven.

Raijin and Jai: That douch is a mod ?

Ravager: O my, I am not well liked am I ?
kuripoo whats wrong, why are you still a red ?
wouldn't you like to be a yellow ?

Kuri: I'm sorry i don't pay for what my skills can get me.

Ravager: Hmmm, too bad. What about you Jayjay ?
You might be an annoying little twat but i bet you could use a little more popularity.

Jai: Pass, after all it wouldn't be any fun if i dont hear you're excuses when I'm top.

Ravager: You really think thats possible ? Look around. I'm the only blue here.

A girl in high-class clothes can be seen looking at Ravager.

Ravager: The only other two are there in the arena section fighting. The blue class is made for those with the means to reach it. This game is no longer about skill or fun. It's about making the rich feel less depress and the poor feel less alone.

Cursed Spear Revenger, Diarmuid is seen striking down Beast Deity, Azure Dragon.

RA-4: Thats 10. 10 fighters have fallen at the hands or Lord Vidi. Is there anyone that can stand against him ?

Jai: You're right Ravager, its all about money to some.

Ravager is seen smiling.

Jai Climbs on the rail and jumps in the arena, leaving the group in shock.

Jai Points to Lord Vidi with a smirk on his face.

RA-4: Whats this ? A new challenger HAS JUST APPEARED!!!

To Be Continued.

I still can't get over the fact that my character's the most serious person XD(I'm not even a bit serious lmao)

Quote from: Ellinopoulo on May 29, 2014, 10:59:20 AM

I still can't get over the fact that my character's the most serious person XD(I'm not even a bit serious lmao)

Now now..it's called a fiction for a reason.. :P

What is this eAe
Actually pretty decent o3ob

Yeah its pretty good. Btw blue is the top, yellow is the middle, and red is the bottom? That sounds familiar....

Quote from: ヤタ on May 29, 2014, 11:17:27 AM

What is this eAe
Actually pretty decent o3ob

You may check the first post of the first page of this thread to answer your Q :P It's a fan-fiction. Jai was planning to use the forum users as characters but since that only a few volunteered.. o3o

Quote from: Seiryuu on May 29, 2014, 11:30:26 AM

Quote from: ヤタ on May 29, 2014, 11:17:27 AM
What is this eAe
Actually pretty decent o3ob

You may check the first post of the first page of this thread to answer your Q :P It's a fan-fiction. Jai was planning to use the forum users as characters but since that only a few volunteered.. o3o

like that would stop me from making characters based off of them.

next up trans-sexual yata. i am not joking he/she is coming.

Ft: Yea its based off of Gx. i also based the whole going to a cyber world thing from Chaotic.

chapter 4 will actually have a card fight and a little more humor. also if any of you would happen to be able to draw halve decently i wouldnt mind working with you to make this an actual web comic.

I WAS ONE OF THE FEW :D

Oh god I'm trans D:
*prepares godbeams*

On a side note if I'm going to become reversed I already have a reverse unit and a crossride for the after-reverse

Quote from: Ellinopoulo on May 29, 2014, 11:54:01 AM

On a side note if I'm going to become reversed I already have a reverse unit and a crossride for the after-reverse

then i guess trans yata has a future boy toy.

Quote from: "infamous" Jai Of Hearts on May 29, 2014, 11:58:48 AM

Quote from: Ellinopoulo on May 29, 2014, 11:54:01 AM
On a side note if I'm going to become reversed I already have a reverse unit and a crossride for the after-reverse

then i guess trans yata has a future boy toy.

eAe
I will make you condense into a black hole Jai

Quote from: "infamous" Jai Of Hearts on May 29, 2014, 11:58:48 AM

Quote from: Ellinopoulo on May 29, 2014, 11:54:01 AM
On a side note if I'm going to become reversed I already have a reverse unit and a crossride for the after-reverse

then i guess trans yata has a future boy toy.

COME AGAIN

I volunteer for being in the fanfic.

Quote from: Maya Kaito on May 29, 2014, 01:28:35 PM

I volunteer for being in the fanfic.

ok pm me your info and what clan you care for the most.

i could really use some more people since creating new characters take time and after the next chapter the fan fic goes into phase 2.

whats in phase 2 you wonder ?
keep wondering.

$ gets real?

The camera opens in the Arena.

Vidi looks at Jai with an emotionless, un-surprised face.

Jai is seen pointing at Vidi with a smirk on his face, as a soda can his him on the head.

People in the crowd: Boo!, Get out of there you noob!, Hey i got him on the head!

The crowd trows trash at Jai as he tried to dodge all of them.

Raijin: O, that is harsh.

Jai: Since when do we have food ?!!

Ravager: Since the update apparently.

Jai: What possible reason would the they have for adding food ?!!!

Vidi exhales as the arena section lowers to the floor.

He turns around and heads towards the exit.

Ravager: What did he expect would happen ? No blue in the right mind would fight a red.

Just then a girl in the crowd jumps on the rail.

girl: You there, commoner!! I Sandra will Accept your challange.

Sandra leaps into the arena.

Jai tries to catch her but ends up on his back with sandra on his chest.

Raijin: Wow must be a leap year. huh ? Check out her ID!

Kuri: A blue ? Shes a blue.

Ravager: The High class girl is in Sandra, shes a real ace. Probably as strong as Vidi.

Sandra: O my you are cute for a commoner.

Jai: I also have trouble breathing at the moment.

Vidi is seen looking at Jai in the arena.

Gothic lolita Maid: Master is there something wrong ?

Vidi: Nothing.

Vidi walks away and the camera turns to Jai and sandra in the arena section as it rises.

RA-4: People today for the first time ever there will be a match between a red and a blue. In one corner we have Sandra, A multi-time tournament champion vs Jai of Hearts, another multi-tournament winner before the ranking system came online.

Both players sets there starting Vanguard Face down.

RA-4: While both are Different class ranking, there both extremely strong fighters.

Jai and Sandra are seen drawing.

RA-4: Will this match prove that class means nothing or will it only strengthen the newly implemented system.

The time for talk is over it, IT'S TIME TO CARDFIGHT!!!

Sandra and Jai: STAND UP, VAGUARD!!!

Both fighters revealed there cards as light fills two parts of the field.

Sandra: Broccolini Musketeer, Kirah.

Jai: Little Fighter, Cron.

Both units enter the arena in a dramatic fashion and takes battle.

Sandra: You wouldn't mind me taking the lead right ?

Jai: Not at all.

Sandra: Ride.

Sandra Rides Lily of the Valley Musketeer, Rebecca.

Jai: My go. Ride.

Jai rides Radiant Drummer, Mina. (7k)

Jai attack.

Sandra takes one damage.

Sandra: My go.

Sandra rides White Rose Musketeer, Alberto and calls Pansy Musketeer, Sylvia.

With Sylvia's skill she calls Water Lily Musketeer, Ruth to the other side of the field along with Tulip Musketeer, Mina.

Water Lilys and the vanguards attack hits attack hits.

First damage is a normal card, second is a critical trigger giving Jai's vanguard 5k.

Sylvia's attack is guarded.

Jai stands and draws.

He rides Radiant flautists, Aina (9k) and calls Radiant Eponymic Knight, Name (8k) and Radiant Dagger, Dirk.(7k)

Aina attacks Alberto, Jai checks a critical.

Jai: Aina's skill.

Jai sends Cron from behind Aina to the soul.

He checks the top card and call Radiant Huntgal.(9k)

Huntgal attacks but Sylvia intercepts.

Name attacks as well but is blocked with a 10k guard.

Sandra Rides Carnation Musketeer, Miraina.(11k)

and calls Black Lily Musketeer, Hermann and White Rose Musketeer, Alberto.

Alberto attacks but Jai guards.

Miraina attacks, sandra gets a critical.

Jai checks a draw, giving it to his vanguard.

Hermann attacks but is guarded.

Jai: Stand and draw.

Jai:( 4 damage, i need a comeback)

Jai rides Shining Lancer , The Radiant. (11k)

and calls Radiant Drummer, Mina behind huntgal.

Lancer attacks Maraina.

Jai: Limit Break, go.

Jai counter blasts 2 as all his front units gain +4k.

Sandra Guards with a 10k.

Jai gets a heal trigger giving the power to name.

Jai:(her defense is weakened)

Name's attack hits the vanguard.

Jai: Name's skills activates.

Jai sends Name to the soul and searches the top 7 cards of his deck.

Another Name is called from among them and gains +2k.

The second Name attacks but is blocked.

Huntgal attacks and it hits.

Jai: 4dmg Sandra: 5 dmg

Kuri: Hes hanging on quite nicely.

Raijin you say that like hes in trouble.

Sandra: Draws a card and gets a smile on her face.

Kuri: He might just be now.

Sandra: Bloom now defender of the bliss-filled forest and unsheathe your blade, Holly Musketeer, Elvira. Maraina's break ride skill.

Sandra counter blasts 1 card and retires Hermann and Mina.

She searches the top 6 cards of her deck and calls Dandelion Musketeer, Mirkka and
Cherry Blossom Musketeer, Augusto.

Sandra: limit break times 2.

Raijin: 21k and critical 3 ?

Sandra: Go Elvira and end this.

Sandra does a proud-ritchgirl laugh as Elvira leaps at Jai.

Jai: Not today you dont!

Jai trows down a perfect guard.

Sandra: My you are annoyingly thought to kill.

Sandra gets a heal giving all to Augusto.

Alberto's attack hits, unflipping one card.

Jai gets a draw giving the power to his vanguard.

Sandra: Fare the well, Jai.

Augusto attacks but Jai guards with a 10k and intercepts with Name.

The crowd grows silent, awaiting Jai's next move.

Raijin: Wow it got quiet all of a sudden.

Kuri: Thats because its possible were about to see a now blue get crowned.

Raijin: Jai ? How ?

Kuri: If Jai wins this they will make him a blue to lessen the rioting.

Raijin: Where gonna riot ? Heck yea!

Jai draws a card and looks pleasantly surprised.

Jai: I knew you would come. Mighty golden wolf, Howl as you enter the battle.
I RIDE RADIANT WOLF, GARMORE.

The crowd cheers Garmore's name.

Sandra: Is that your ace ? My he is Radiant.

Jai smiles you aint see nothing yet. I activate Garmore's ROYAL FLUSH!!

Sandra: Royal Flush ?

Jai: I can check the top 5 cards. If the total grade of all cards are 6 or more i can use the skill.

Jai gets a G3

then a G0

Another 0

A G1

A G3

Jai: Now Royal Flush skill.

Jai counter blast's 2 and sends Dirk to the soul.

He checks the top 5 cards of his deck and calls 3 gold paladin units to his open rears.

Jai: Garmore also gets a bonus. If a unit was called to the field if there is one with the same name as it on the field garmore gets a 5k bonus.

Garmore attacks, but sandra trows a pfg.

Jai gets no triggers.

Huntgal attacks and hits.

no trigger for sandra.

Aina attacks and it hits.

Raijin: Booya!!!

Sandra checks getting a heal trigger.

Raijin: Gosh, darnit !!! Why!!!?

Sandra stands and draws.

Sandra:Do you think fate would let someone of my class fall ?
Now for the Finale.

Elvira Attacks Garmore.

Jai checks, no heal.

The units disappears, the crowds dissipates.

People from crowd: I knew he couldn't win. Figures a blue wins. A reds should just stick to fighting other reds. She must have went easy on him.

Sandra Approaches Jai.

Sandra: Its's sad isn't it ? Only one day and there's already all this discrimination. Hey are you alright ?

Jai: No...that was one of the best high i ever got in a while !

Sandra: Uuh high.

Jai Grabs Sandra's hands.

Jai: Yes, the back and forth. Thought i was gonna lose but then i got garmore.
Thank you so much.

Sandra: My you are joy-full one.

MIDNIGHT.

GM: EVERYBODY ASLEEP GET UP!!!

Jai awakens as he sees he has fallen asleep with Sandra next to him, Raijin on Kuri's lap.

Kuri shoves him to the floor.

GM: Brave Fighters your journey is about to start.

Jai: About time.

Raijin: Heck yea, together we will take down whoever has the gull to stand in out way.

Kuri: I never told you guy this but, i first hated you two and planned on cutting you both up in your sleep.

....

Jai/Raijin: And now ?

Kuri: Now what ?

Sandra: You guys have room for one more ?

Raijin: Sure thing, honey.

Sandra: Don't call me honey.

Raijin: No problem babe.

GM: Get ready. Get set.

Jai and his team, among other eagerly awaits.

GM: O b-t-dubs everyone is ported to a separate area.

Jai: Say what now.

The are teleported away to the location of the game site.

To Be Continued in Phase 2: The Cray Games.

The Game Master is shown in his private room, drinking what appears to be wine.

Servant: Sir, is this the only way we can locate them ?

GM: Would you prefer we go and ask ? This is the best option, remember how long it took me to find you ? or some of the others ?

Servant: And it has nothing to do with the fact that you
loved the hunger games ?

GM: This is why you are the woman i love.

Servant: And yet you treat me like a mistress, you useless neet.

I'm a freaking psycho lmap

hey guys can i get some feedback on the story so far ?

also still looking for some people to volunteer there names for me to use.

also wouldnt mine some idea's for what you might think is interesting.

your story is amzing! can i be in it...i dont mind being a villain or whatever

hmm...i was thinking i need another good antagonist for the next phase.

ok sure. im just letting my head come up with ideas and i might execute em on monday or something.

Quote from: "infamous" Jai Of Hearts on May 31, 2014, 07:44:44 AM

hmm...i was thinking i need another good antagonist for the next phase.

ok sure. im just letting my head come up with ideas and i might execute em on monday or something.

nice~
so should i pm you?

Quote from: Hunter on May 31, 2014, 08:06:21 AM

Quote from: "infamous" Jai Of Hearts on May 31, 2014, 07:44:44 AM
hmm...i was thinking i need another good antagonist for the next phase.

ok sure. im just letting my head come up with ideas and i might execute em on monday or something.

nice~
so should i pm you?

yes with your clans characters style, and i will feed back you my idea and we see where things go.

i dont wanna spoil for the other readers whats ahead.

The character style thing is fake I told him I'm not serious and fun to be around and he made me a serious psycho XD

Quote from: Ellinopoulo on May 31, 2014, 12:48:56 PM

The character style thing is fake I told him I'm not serious and fun to be around and he made me a serious psycho XD

would you rather i tell em the truth ?

that you're a psycho stalker.

Uhhhh no I'm just realy not serious

Ok...

ok i dont know how many of you read this, but did you notice i made a card called radiant huntgal ?

i just finished watching the new ep and i whent to the wiki and saw that the new gal is called huntgal liberator.

what are the chances ?

I take it your build has Flawless Lion Fabulous Ezel "THE SHAMPOO" as well?

Quote from: Ellinopoulo on June 01, 2014, 08:19:20 AM

I take it your build has Flawless Lion Fabulous Ezel "THE SHAMPOO" as well?

nope were only radiant.

Quote from: "infamous" Jai Of Hearts on June 01, 2014, 09:22:08 AM

Quote from: Ellinopoulo on June 01, 2014, 08:19:20 AM
I take it your build has Flawless Lion Fabulous Ezel "THE SHAMPOO" as well?

nope were only radiant.

Did you actually not get what I said?I mocked Blond Ezel

Quote from: Ellinopoulo on June 01, 2014, 09:27:49 AM

Quote from: "infamous" Jai Of Hearts on June 01, 2014, 09:22:08 AM
Quote from: Ellinopoulo on June 01, 2014, 08:19:20 AM
I take it your build has Flawless Lion Fabulous Ezel "THE SHAMPOO" as well?

nope were only radiant.

Did you actually not get what I said?I mocked Blond Ezel

no i got it, im just gonna let the hard core ezel users that are stalking you beat the crap out of you.

Something tells me you don't like me very much...

Quote from: "infamous" Jai Of Hearts on June 01, 2014, 08:15:10 AM

ok i dont know how many of you read this, but did you notice i made a card called radiant huntgal ?

i just finished watching the new ep and i whent to the wiki and saw that the new gal is called huntgal liberator.

what are the chances ?

yup i know...

Quote from: Ellinopoulo on June 01, 2014, 09:35:19 AM

Something tells me you don't like me very much...

thats preposterous, i never liked you.

Nice work! :P

Quote from: "infamous" Jai Of Hearts on June 01, 2014, 02:05:05 PM

Quote from: Ellinopoulo on June 01, 2014, 09:35:19 AM
Something tells me you don't like me very much...

thats preposterous, i never liked you.

Well admitting it is the first step :D

Quote from: Ellinopoulo on June 01, 2014, 02:46:53 PM

Quote from: "infamous" Jai Of Hearts on June 01, 2014, 02:05:05 PM
Quote from: Ellinopoulo on June 01, 2014, 09:35:19 AM
Something tells me you don't like me very much...

thats preposterous, i never liked you.

Well admitting it is the first step :D

and smacking you with my pimps hand is the second.

The Camera opens in a futuristic like city as a young man with brown hair and a wide grin walks threw the market area.

Man: Someone stop that boy!!

A boy is seen running with a large piece of bread in his arms, passing the young man.

?: And here i thought today was gonna be another boring trip to the store.

The young man takes off with an amazing speed, jumping and running on a wall.

The young man lands in-front of the boy as he crashes in him like a brick wall and gets knocked down.

?: This wolf, this one right here always gets his pray.

Man: O thank you very much. This little street urchant has been stealing my bread for the past few weeks.

The man grabs the boy in a vice-grip like hold on his arm.

Man: With the war going on of all things we have to deal with thieves aswell.

A shocked expression falls on young mans face as if he has just received a revelation.

?: Sir, is this you're bread.

Man: Yes, from my store.

?: My how wonderfull. You just saved me a trip to the store little guy. Mind if i pay for the bread ?

The man and the boy have puzzled expressions on there faces.

The young man hands the bread man some money, the man released the boy and leaves.

?: Are you hungry little guy ?

The young man tries the give the boy a piece of his bread, but the boy only turns a cheek.

?: Ha, i remember what it was like. Living without a friends, family, a home. I've even lived in the wild almost all my childhood. But then someone helped me and so i made a promise to myself, that if i ever find another person in the same situation i was. I would help them.

The boy looks at the young man as if he was looking at an alien being.

The young man extends his right hand to the boy.

Garmore: My name is Garmore. Can you tell me yours ?

The boy extends his own hard to hold Garmore's.

?: My name is.....

Cray: Vivire Chapter 3.5 Vitam

Just a little something showing where the red warriors new life started.

Something i have always liked about fun and engaging stories they always drop a little something for the future.

The next phase will be up tomorrow... maybe.

To those that read this thank you for you're time and i wouldn't mind some more feedback as to how you feel about this series.

and again i ask every and anyone that wants to be in these story send me some of your info.

thank you for your time.

hideyoshi i dont really get what you just did there.

oops... i meant the idea seemed like yu gi oh gx where red are dirt blue are most op and yellow medium

Quote from: (T.A)Hideyoshi on June 01, 2014, 09:09:07 PM

oops... i meant the idea seemed like yu gi oh gx where red are dirt blue are most op and yellow medium

Well unfortunately enough for you..none of us can tell what you're trying to say with mere quotation ^^

p/s: and Jai..keep up the good work ^^ I'm enjoying the series :3

just wut is his name...

Quote from: "infamous" Jai Of Hearts on June 01, 2014, 05:08:28 PM

Quote from: Ellinopoulo on June 01, 2014, 02:46:53 PM
Quote from: "infamous" Jai Of Hearts on June 01, 2014, 02:05:05 PM
Quote from: Ellinopoulo on June 01, 2014, 09:35:19 AM
Something tells me you don't like me very much...

thats preposterous, i never liked you.

Well admitting it is the first step :D

and smacking you with my pimps hand is the second.

Ow come on I'm lovable

Keep this fanfiction up.I can't wait to see all of it.I will read it with pleasue if it will be done and I will send you Pm about myself I would like be in this story very much.

Quote from: Ellinopoulo on June 02, 2014, 06:10:20 AM

Quote from: "infamous" Jai Of Hearts on June 01, 2014, 05:08:28 PM
Quote from: Ellinopoulo on June 01, 2014, 02:46:53 PM
Quote from: "infamous" Jai Of Hearts on June 01, 2014, 02:05:05 PM
Quote from: Ellinopoulo on June 01, 2014, 09:35:19 AM
Something tells me you don't like me very much...

thats preposterous, i never liked you.

Well admitting it is the first step :D

and smacking you with my pimps hand is the second.

Ow come on I'm lovable

like dirt you are.

hunter his name for now is the red warrior.

jaden thanks man, and i already have and idea for a type of ending. all i need is to fill in the middle.
in truth depending on the way i feel and how much ideas i come up with vol might be finished by next month.

Why do you hate me so much?

red warrior eh...your story is great!everytime i on my lappy i will go here and read your story...its very interseting

Quote from: Ellinopoulo on June 02, 2014, 09:51:58 AM

Why do you hate me so much?

would you rather i love you ?
just know that im a top

hunter: thanks and i will try to keep it that way.

The Camera opens in a quiet blue sky as a bird flies and a man falls on top of it, wait what ?

Raijin: AAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!

Raijin, Jai, Kuri and Sandra can be seen falling from the sky.

Area Forum --> CFA --> Creative Works Proudly presents.

Cardfight Vivire: The Cray Games.

Jai:(looks like there's plenty of tree's down there. Maybe if i had a scythe i could stick to one of em, or maybe some gauntlet's with guns installed in em, or someone with a speak and stick me to a three, Or....?.)

Jai is safely on the ground.

Jai: Or i could land safely in a forest area.

A hologram screen appears in-front of him.

GM: Did everyone have a nice fall ?

Jai punches threw the hologram, his fist lands on a nearby tree.

GM:Now if all of you would please look at your deck case. Inside there one card, your starting vanguard from before you enter.
You will use the starter of the deck you have loaded before entering the tournament.

Kuri is shown in a dark and gloomy area.

You will use that starter to wear its armor and use its abilities. The rules are simple, this is an rpg style contest where you will battle one another along with many virtual creatures allong the way, in order to reach the mountain top.

A map opens in-front of Sandra who is located in a dessert like area.

Along the way you must battle and defeat as many creatures as you can in order to level up and gain cards of highgrade to transform.
the rest of the rules will be written in the instructions manual at the bottom of your screen, simply click your ID in-order to open the menu.

GM: Now to all fighters, MAY THE ODDS BE EVER IN YOUR FAVOR.

The screen disappears as the map remains with a red dot blinking on the mountain.

Sandra: Man now this is a twist. I mean if it was a straight forward cardfight tournament we would have all been on equal footing.

Kuri: The fact that he said all teams are dissolved means that he separated every and all personal that have been known to pair up.
which leaves everyone on there own, with no way of contacting one another.

Jai: It's a survival game plain and simple. We need to kill our opponents or be killed. If i could reach someone i know i could pair up with them. but how am i gonna find em.

The sound of a rustling bush is heard behind Jai.

As he turns around his cloths transform into the armor of Little Fighter, Cron.

A girl comes out shocked as her clothes transform into that of Girl Who Crossed the Gap.

The two stare at each other for a long few seconds, frozen with nervousness.

Jai: Umm...hi.

The girl lunges at Jai Knocking him to the ground.

Jai blocks her assault with his right hand in a defensive position, but the girl bites it.

Jai knocks the girl back, but she gets up and begins to run.

He gives chase to the female, with her in a impressive lead.

As she gains an even greater lead she is quickly stabs from the side by a Barcgal as an unknown fighter arrives.

Jai hides behind a tree and peeks at the situation.

The females fighters body vanishes leaving behind a card.

Jai:( So that's it, each time we beat a fighter we get a card. Allowing us to transform into stronger creatures. If, if i attack him now.)

Jai tries to move his legs but is unable to.

Jai: ( I can't move. Why can't i move ?)

The barcgal begins to bark as the man turns to Jai's direction.

He slowly begins to wall to Jai, but is attacked by an unknown creature and taken away.

Jai remains still on the ground, puzzled by his own expressions.

The camera zooms out on a tv screen in a room filled with my others showing many fighters from across.

Servant: I guess this is how you like getting off, you little sadist.

GM: O my is that what you think of me ? You gotta admit this is a good way for them to grow a little as people. Most of these people are gamer's, the no life stay at home type. To putt them in a situation they are not familiar with, let alone never imagined themselves in.

Servant: Will get you off in a way that your nightly internet time can never do.

GM: You do remember i own you right ?

The female servant pulls out a tapeplayer and presses play, the words " you do remember i own you right ?" comes out of the player.

Servant: I think the authorities would enjoy hearing whats on this tape.

GM: Please don't, you know I'm only joking. Come on we're childhood friends. Can't you take a joke ?

The Camera Zooms in on a tv screen, showing Kuri hiding in the shadows of a ruined area.

Kuri: I need to stay hidden and strike anyone that comes by. I'm glad a Nubatama user.

Girl: ahh please stop.

Kuri quickly moves and hides behind a wall near where a girl can be seen on the floor.

Four men surrounding her from each side with no way for her to leave.

Man 1: Well well looks like we sound ourselves a play mate. Get her up.

Kuri are you kidding me ? Here of all places there are people like that ?

one of the men holds the girl up and the other one grabs her face.

Man 1: Now whats your name sweety.

Girl:...

Man 1: Don't manna talk huh ? Don't worry we have a nice little something for that mouth of yours.

Kuri eyes grows in anger as she looks on.

The one that appears to lead the group transforms into normal clothes and begins to unzip his pants.

Kuri: That's it i don't care if i lose.

Just as Kuri is about to reveal herself the leader of the group begins to scream.

Man 2: Hey whats happening ?

The man holding the girl also begins to scream in pain both holding there crotches.

Girl: Now this is why I had the Master install some senses into the game.

The Girls voice changes to that of a man.

Girl/Man ?!: Don't worry it will all be over soon. I just want you to remember how you where banned and spread it around, ok ? <3

The men vanish leaving only there screams behind echoing.

Girl/Man: You can come out now.

Kuri shows herself to the Man...i mean girl, whatever.

Kuri: So this is your game. Gathering most lawbreakers in one place in order to clean up. Tell me how much of an influence do you have on the game master ? YATA THE CLEANER.

Yata shoots a smile at Kuri, while in the dark another fighter in a cloak is seen spying on both.

?: Looks like my HUNT will take a little while longer.
To Be Continued.

Don't tell me you made me emo too....And FYI Kagaku's armor is black

Quote from: Ellinopoulo on June 02, 2014, 01:12:04 PM

Don't tell me you made me emo too....And FYI Kagaku's armor is black

but does it cover his whole body ?

No his skin is lava coloured the armor covers part of his head,his shoulders,his claws,His chest and his feet

Quote from: Ellinopoulo on June 02, 2014, 01:50:48 PM

No his skin is lava coloured the armor covers part of his head,his shoulders,his claws,His chest and his feet

i will change it a little.

XD OK I'll admit that made me laugh

Quote from: Ellinopoulo on June 02, 2014, 01:55:19 PM

XD OK I'll admit that made me laugh

sadist.

man/girl? hahaha...a trap

Quote from: Hunter on June 03, 2014, 12:24:02 AM

man/girl? hahaha...a trap

well it was a trap.

which brings us to one of the unspoken rules in that world: never sexually hares unless you want to feel the worst pain a man can feel.

due to Ellinopoulo dissliking the fact that i made his character the serious one i will replace him with a new character and will be taking a small hiatus to reform the story somewhat.

You don't have to go through all that I was just joking you could just give him a change of heart or make the whole coo coo serious thing just his cover behind the happy and completely not serious true self

ok editing completed.

Nick is completely removed and Kuri is now the second main.

the reason i removed nick is because if i change his character now it would make no sense.

next up chapter 4.5 then chapter 5 which will show Kuri and yata's confrontation, meanhile Jai will encounter someone that will be instrumental to his future.

The Camera opens with the sounds of wings flapping in the air, a bird fields beside the screen.

This is a story about my life before, after and now.

Two young brown-haired children, one boy one girl can be seen playing together.

This is me and my brother as we play near our family's vacation home..

Every year we used to go and spend time together, leaving with smiles and fun memories.

Untill that year year.

The sky is shown going dark as fears winds begins to blow.

A cabin is shown, people can be heard moving inside.

Before a fears hurricane came from out of nowhere and...

The roof of the cabin rips form its body and flies to the sky.

changed everything.

Our parents managed to find a safe place for us, but at the cost of having no place for themselves.

My brother alone buried them near the tree they loved to sleep under, forever together.

As time passes out supplies get less and less, my brother decided to leave and go get help.

I was there alone for so long that, i didn't know if i would ever see another living person again.

Just as all hope was about to leave me the door opened.

?: Have you been all by yourself all this time ?

A woman clad in angelic attire came to save me.

It was like a sign from above, I was so happy, so happy i was saved.

But even that happiness came with sadness.

The girl can be seen eating and drinking.

?: is it any good ?

girl: Where's my brother ?

?: Brother ?

?: He told me he was gonna get help and then you came.

The woman goes silent as her eyes show one that is about to deliver a sad news.

?: Listen sweety...

She told me that no one came asking for help.

She came looking for me because she worked with me parents and knew where we were.

She didn't know that they were already gone, now i know my brother is gone too...

that is untill a two years later.

The girl can be seen a little taller and looking at a news paper.

My brother was found in the woods living with snowgals.

I was so happy that i fell to my knee's and thank God that i wasn't alone anymore.

With my newly formed connections with the angel feathers I was able to see him again.

Now 5 years later i once again visit him like i do every year.

Only this time im a full fledged Angel Feather Warrior.

A woman in angelic motif armor can be seen flying in the air.

She lands in a wide grass area full of dogs of different breeds, walking to the door and ringing the bell.

I can't wait to see the look on his dumb face.

A boy opens the door.

?: Hello. Can I help you ?

?: Who, who are you ?

Cardfight Vivire

Chapter 4.5

The Wings of Hope.

Looks like .5 chapters are a thing for me now.

do you guys like that i go deep into the past or would you rather not know ?

do you like how i let the character herself tell the tale ?

do you wanna see chapter 5 already ?

give me some feedback and remember i could still use some more characters.

o and this ones for hunter. you're up next chapter, maybe.

and a spoiler for jaden, you have a future.

Next up chapter 5 Kill la kill each other then chapter 5.5 Garmore Born To Be WILD.

I am ok with that.That I am in future since I don't mind it.Your fanfiction is good and well I like it.I don't care if you go to past or to future since when fanfiction is good and I can understand what happens there and it is fun to read then I don't care about it much.Keep up good work.

Quote from: [MK]Jaden on June 04, 2014, 12:04:20 PM

I am ok with that.That I am in future since I don't mind it.Your fanfiction is good and well I like it.I don't care if you go to past or to future since when fanfiction is good and I can understand what happens there and it is fun to read then I don't care about it much.Keep up good work.

jaden you fill my heart with so much joy.

truth be told i had my own ideas and stuff, but since i have no way to make a web comic it never took off.
which is kinda where my name comes from.

can't wait...can't wait...argh...i want more cray viviere

im sorry its taking so long to post, its because sometimes im tired from the gym and that my original taught for the next chapters was somewhat going nowhere so im trying to beef up the quality a little.

now to work on chapter 5.

Quote from: "infamous" Jai Of Hearts on June 05, 2014, 12:36:59 PM

im sorry its taking so long to post, its because sometimes im tired from the gym and that my original taught for the next chapters was somewhat going nowhere so im trying to beef up the quality a little.

now to work on chapter 5.

Just take your time and give us something good <3

The camera opens to a cloaked man moving swiftly in the shadows, covered in a cloak blending into the darkness.

Has he moves he spots Kuri as she hid behind a wall.

Hunter: Target set.

Cray Vivire

Chapter 5

We see a fighter walking in the forest, his clothes suddenly transform to armor.

fighter: Who's there ? Show yourself !

Jai can be seen hiding in the grass, frozen with nervous ness.

The fighter slowly backs , turns and runs from the area.

Jai: ( Man, im just a coward. Someone else is coming.)

A silhouette of a girl can be seen walking t words Jai's direction.

Jai:(A girl. Now's my chance. I mean how hard can a girl be ?)

Jai flashes back to a scene where Kuri has her foot on his head as he is kneeling on the floor.

Jai: (Maybe i should let this one pass ? Now i need to do this, in the name of all men this the world. I must dig into my male instinct's and...) ATTACK!!!

Jai leaps towards the girl, the screen fading to white leaving only a girlish scream.

meanwhile Kuri confronts the moderator Yata The Cleaner.

Yata: Well we had to take care of some of the trash that seeped back into arena

Kuri: How did they return ?

Yata: O you know they found someone who wormed there way to power.

The screen cuts to Ravager sneezing as he counts a load of money.

Kuri: So this means your all keeping a close eye on everyone ?

Yata: Ofcourse silly. <3

Kuri: ( Yata is one of the first mods. Originally we were pretty close, but that was before his status change and his umm ...transformation.)

Yata: Well, if we're done talk. I'm off to excessive force on more perverts <3

Kuri: Wait i have one question. What is this contest for ?

Yata: To find the new mod of-course, there's no other hidden agenda.<3

Kuri: If the Gamer Master cared who would be the authority, he wouldn't have modded a greedy low life.

The camera cuts to Ravager sneezing.

Yata: Is there something you wanted to say Kuri-chan ? <3 I know you arn't one to stay silent for long.

Kuri: This change, its too drastic. I just have this feeling that something is wrong, something bad is going to happen.

Yata walks to Kuri and taps her on the head.

Yata: ...Kuri dont worry about it. Just play the game and we will talk later.

Yata begins to float in the air.

Kuri: (It's amazing how they get even super human powers in this world. Gotta admit i wouldn't mind having that power.)

Yata: O and you're being stalked.

Hunter: She knows.

Two knives gets thrown at Kuri as they both hit.

Yata: That should keep her mind off of things.

Yata teleports away, Hunter in the form of Vermillion Gatekeeper.

Hunter: hmmp, substitution. A ninja user.

A log is seen on the floor with two knives stuck in its body.

Kuri leaps from the shadows in the form of Stealth Beast, Kuroko at Hunter, both clashing in a battle of knives vs kunai.

Hunter removed glove form his left hand as it turns blue, releasing an blue smoke.

Hunter: This hand of mine burns with an awesome power.

Hunter moves towards Kuri grabing her right hand with his left burning it.

Kuri's scream can be heard reaching the sky, she stabs Hunter as he backs off.

Kuri runs into the darkness.

Hunter: It's no good, once i get your scent i never forget it. Do you hear me girl ? I will find you.

Kuri runs in to forest in panic tripping and falling in the darkness.

Kuri:( How are we suppose win this ? When people like that are playing ?)

Kuri looks at her burned hand.

Kuri:( Shouldn't this still be hurting ? Come to think of it, i pulled of a substitution back there. Maybe there more to this game then meets the eye ? I must survive, I must find my friends. Because I know they will survive to find me.)

We are shown a futuristic city as a woman with angelic wings is shown walking towards the city, in her arms a passed out Jai.

GM: Yata, how goes the cleaning ?

Yata: All the obvious trash has been recycled.

GM: Good, keep me posted.

The GM stares at the monitor showing Jai in the arms of a woman with wings, Kuri setting in the darkness, Sandra killing lizard soldiers and Raijin in an area full of machines.

GM: i wonder how long it will take for them to notice that flow of time in this worlds.

The winged woman holding putts Jai down in a cave.

?:This should be a good place to hide.

She looks at Jai with a smile on her face.

?: Guess you're training can start later.

Raijin: Old man don't die.

Raijin is seen in a area full of metal walls holding a man in his arms.

Man: My hope, my dreams is now in your hands. Take it, take my machine.

The GM walks to a window showing a mansion at a mountain.

GM: Come brave fighters and show me who among you hold the spirit's of cray inside of you as i do.

TO BE CONTINUED...RIGHT AFTER THE TIME SKIP XD.

The Screen shows a female fighter climbing a mountain, she enters a dark cave.

Fighter: Wow its been 3 days. I think I'm the farthest one.

A sound of machinery can be heard in the cave.

Fighter: Is someone there ?

A man with a cyber body can be seen in the dark, its face covered with a shadow.

He opens his red eyes, they glow with lifeless light in them.

Fighter: What are you ?

Metal tentacles attack the woman, only the shadows vaguely shows whats happening to her.

The noise stops as she stands up, the metal man looking at her un-moved from his seat.

Fighter: Conversion complete.

Next up chapter 5.5: we are gonna see Garmore's past.

then chapter 6 : We get a time skip as the plot begins to thicken.

Gonna hurt you for using <3 when I don't <3 :v
And I'm more sadistic than that~~

Quote from: ヤタ on June 05, 2014, 02:26:32 PM

Gonna hurt you for using <3 when I don't <3 :v
And I'm more sadistic than that~~

when using <3 he is speaking with a female voice.

and there is a limit to sadistic things i can do and i think i just reached the limit.

*pins Jai to a wall with knives*
do you want to continue <3?

Quote from: ヤタ on June 05, 2014, 02:39:59 PM

*pins Jai to a wall with knives*
do you want to continue <3?

depends. am i allow to do to you anything i can and please ?

We open in a laboratory where a golden armor in the form of a wolf lies in a device.

A man is seen holding his arm on a golden armor, multiple charts are seen spiking up high on multiple screens.

Professor: Thats enough.

A woman with black marks under her eye walks towards the man.

Professor: Salutations, you got a new armor.

Garmore: Gee already ? It wasn't too long ago I got the last one.

Professor: Once we're done with the rest of the tests, you can try it on.

Garmore is seen walking in the streets of the Sanctuary.

Ahh, this takes me back. to the my first day back in the sanctuary.

We cut back to a very young Garmore with his sister many years ago.

Garmore: Stay here, I'll be back as soon as i can.

?: No, don't go.

I believe she was to young at the time to understand.

Our parent's gone, our lives in danger. Now me abandoning her.

I had no choice knowing winter was coming. And so i braved the road unknown.

Recalling every spot we passed to get here. But I was young and foolish.

Being so far from the sanctuary i got lost in the woods.

I spend days, weeks surviving alone. But with no survival knowledge at my side,

it was only a matter of time before i collapsed in the woods.

Young Garmore lies in the dirt as snow begins to fall, a creature slowly approaches him.

When i was at the brink of death, i was saved but the most unlikely of ally.

I awakened to find a wild snogal watching me with sharp eyes.

My heart stilled at that moment, untill i noticed 4 young pups eating fish.

And one fish infront of me. I look at the snowgal and notice a scar on her belly.

At that moment a buried memory in me awakens.

long ago my mother and father two military vets saved a snowgal.

She stays with us for our time, but unlimitly must be returned to the wild.

I slowly picked up the fish and begin to eat it.

I didn't like the mushy taste or the blood, but I ate it all.

In time I started draining the fish or there blood, eat fruits i see them eat, recall everything my parents ever told me about snogals.

Two years i lived with them, ate with them, bath with them.

They became my new family. But I still remembered my old family.

When i was able to find my way back to my sister she was gone.

That day i decided that i am gonna find my sister.

When my new mother passed i rallied my brothers and set of for the United Sanctuary, for my home, for my sister.

Piecing back together old memories I journeyed back home.

When i reached the Sanctuary it was all alien to me. The buildings the people,

everything changed so much.

It didn't take my brothers long to grab every fruit in sight, demolishing a melon cart.

Melon seller: Not My Mellon's !!!!

it didn't take long for the authorities to arrive. Still thinking like a beast i attacked them.

A young man in the crowd saw my take them down.

He comes at me with a wooden sword.

Me thinking only of attacking him didn't notice the stick untill in crashed on my head.

While i was groggy they cuffed and drag me to there station.

After a few interviews and speaking for the first time in many years to another human being i learned that my sister was alive an well.

Now in the education system of the Angels.

After so many years I was so happy to see her again, both of us in tears.

We stayed together for a month untill the young swordsman came to my home and gave me an offer.

Ahmes: Join the Royal Paladins, with your strength i know we can protect this world together.

Garmore is shown walking to his home in a wide grass field.

His many dogs run to him with joy.

So much has happened in my life, so much has changed and so much more to come.

Garmore opens the door to his home and enters.

Garmore: I'm back.

?: Welcome home brother

Garmore: Zeviel, what are you doing here ?!

Zeviel: O brother is that what you say to a sister that came from far to visit. Now Garmore what did I tell you the last time i was hear about picking up strays.

Garmore: But I didn't-

Zeviel: I was talking about him.

Zeviel points to the boy in the room.

?: ?

Cray Vivire

Chapter 5.5

Garmore, The Wolf King.

gimme some feed back and yata cant touch me.

nice one dude...i like my character...striking fear in the hearts of women ;D

I am currently writing the next chapter.

so stay tuned.

and i would like some more feedbacks.

We open in the Sanctuary section of the Area Adventure world as a group of three people are seen running.

Not far behind them a berserk Phantom Blaster Dragon approaches.

The dragon corners them in dead end, emphasis on the word dead.

Cherry: Alan you know what we have to do.

Alan: Right, it's for the good of the team.

They both grab the female member for there them and hold her.

Alan/Cherry: O great dragon please accept this virgin sacrifice and let us live.

Kat: What are you doing ?

Alan: I'm sorry Kat but this is survival of the fittest.

Cherry: it's true you look good in that Silver Thorn Assistant, Irina outfit, but we can always find a new replacement.

Kat: I will haunt you guys.

The dragon prepares to slash them to death with its mighty claws.

Jai: Hey, you guys do know we can't really die right ?

Jai appears on-top of a building wearing red armor on top, but with a pirate hat and boots.

Jai: IT'S JAI TIME !!!

He leaps from the building stabbing the dragon with his rapier in the eye.

Alan: I do believe we found a crazy person.

Jai falls hard to the ground as the dragon screams in agony, it retreats.

Jai: Now...how'ed you like...that.

He tries to get up but it's clear that he tool allot of damage.

Cherry: He lost his weapon, I GOT THIS !!!.

Cherry attacks Jai, but the young knight pulls a gun in-front of his face.

Cherry: What kind of knight has a gun.

Jai: An ex-pirate apparently.

Alan: Now hold, we can talk about this.

Kat: I say shoot him, then shoot him.

Jai: I have a better idea. Why don't you guys walk out of here.

Alan: really ? Because even if one of us can't fight.

Jai: The girl is leaving.

Alan: It's still two on one.

Jai point's behind himself, Alan side steps to see a winged woman on the building Jai was on.

Jai: O and shes at grade 3, I'm grade 2. But you're still grade 1 and if I'm not mistaken, so is he.

Alan looks at him with a glare, as Jai counter's with a confidant smile.

We see Jai and the woman see the two men walk away.

?: I told you you should stayed out if it.

Jai: Hey that girl needed a chance.

?: It seem's you have a weakness to the opposite sex, little cherry boy.

ONE WEEK AGO

We have a close up of Jai opening his eyes.

As we pull back we see a women sleeping on his chest.

A panicky look appears on his face, unknown of what had happen to let up to this moment.

The women opens her eyes and stares with sleepy eyes at him.

Jai: Hi.

?: Well hello there. You were something last night.

Jai: (Last night ?!)

?: You where a beast.

Jai: (A beast ?!!)

?: I was so scared but once i accepted it i understood my place. I hope you can take responsibility.

Jai: NO, MY WILDSIDE HAS FAILED ME.

Jai is clearly seen in a panicked state, but quickly clams down.

He remembers getting knocked out by the women in-front of him.

Jai: You knocked me out.

?: Aww you're no fun. I'm at grade one and you're at grade 0. Even if it was a head to head battle, you couldn't possibly defeat me. You my boy need some training.

Her name is Zara an angel feather user.

She's told me she wanted to help me because i reminded her of a puppy she once had.

Little that I know, I would later ow her so much.

Cardfight Vivire

Chapter 6

We open in the lava area where a Dragonic Overlord is seen burning many creatures.

Jaden: Yahoo, I love being a grade 3 user.

A young man with a red jacket is seen beside the dragon.

A group of men is seen hiding behind some rocks, spying on the Jaden.

Man 1: Man we can't beat this guy, look at that thing.

Kuri: Maybe you guy's should pay more attention to your surrounding.

Kuri in the form of Stealth Rogue of a Thousand Blades, Oborozakura slices two of the men.

Man 1: No my team.

Kuri raises her sword preparing to give him the killing blow.

Jaden: Wow, hold on now.

Kuri: What do you think you are doing ?

Jaden: The boss wanted us to bring one back for Maya remember ?

Kuri: And what happened to all the ones you where burning ?

Jaden: They came out of a little extra crispy.

Dragonic Overlord picks up the man and the group behind to walk.

A ship is seen with a small group of people inside and one angry face man sitting calmly inside on the center chair.

Female: Sir it seems the're returning, and they have a gift for Maya.

Abram: Maya let's go.

Maya: Yes sir.

Kuri: After my confrontation with Hunter, I knew i was weak.

So I vowed to get stronger. Joining this team was the only way.

Abram exits the ship and behind him a timed girl in the form of Silver Thorn Beast Tamer, Emil.

Dragonic Overlord lets the man he was holding fall to the ground.

The man looks around in panic as he is surrounded.

Dragonic Overlord steps on his legs, making him immobile.

Abram: Finish him.

Man1: No please no, MERCYYYYYYY!!!.

But this, this is disgraceful.

A card is seen glowing where the man was. Maya pics it up.

Abram: Is it something you can use ?

Maya: Yes, sir.

Maya transforms into the form of Silver Thorn Beast Tamer, Ana.

Abram: Good let's go.

Abram and Maya enter's the ship.

Kuri stares up in the sky, pondering.

Jaden: Hey Kuri, ya coming ?

Jai, Raijin, Sandra. Only thos that are strong and those that are united can survive this long. Please, please still be here.

Jai: So what did you say about me ? That I'm pathetic, a troll, an annoyance to the people around me ?

?: I'm so sorry, please.

Jai is seen with his sword to the neck of a man on the floor.

Zara: Who is he ?

Jai: An old friend, that annoyed me so much.

Zara: And so your solution is to torture him the words ? And here I thought you wouldn't take my advice.

Jai and Zara are seen walking away walking away with Jai holding a card.

Jai: Man I'm finally at grade 3. Tobad this dumb system didn't get my Garmore.

Zara: It appears this system mostly gives us cards we already have in our decks.

Jai: Yea but the best part is almost every card is usable in this system.

Zara: Hey you ever heard the legend of my card and Garmore ? There brother and sister who lost there parent's in a hurricane. Zeviel was then raised with the help of the angels, while Garmore lived in the wild. After he came back and became a knight, he adopted another orphan boy.

Zara opens Jai's palm and hands him a card.

Zara: During the war between the royal paladins and shadow paladins. Garmore when't to fight in the war. Leaving that boy in the care of the Fang Light Celestial, Zeviel.

Jai looks at the card seeing a warrior in red.

The name Radiant The Heart, The Infamous___ , the remaining words covered by Jai's thumb.

Zara: With her love, he grew up into a magnificent warrior. Fighting for those who no one cared to fight for.

Jai: He, just sounds like another lame shonen hero.

Zara: Yea, he kind of is.

We cut to a scene where a Stern Blauklugar is seen evading another machine, firing at it and destroying it.

Hunter: Sir it seems he's escaped again.

?: I'm not paying you to sit around for the trill or it.

Hunter: All he needs to do is land and I will do what i do best. But it won't be my fault is he never comes down.

We zoom in on the blau, inside we see a tired Raijin piloting it.

TO BE CONTINUED

DID YOU LIKE THAT CHAPTER ? WELL DID YOU ? DID YOU ? DID YOU ?

Next chapter allot of gundam references and chapter 6.5, along with a suppliment chapter or two.

Another thing, if anyone reading feel like writing a side chapter about the arena game or cray give me a heads up, i think it would be cool if we could explore more of the world.

jai, even if its a fanfic...IM A FREAKING DUDE

How do we know that?

Quote from: katscaps on June 07, 2014, 02:19:47 PM

jai, even if its a fanfic...IM A FREAKING DUDE

and yata isnt a cross dresser.( or is he?)

YES!! I'm piloting Stern. Weeee~~~~~~ KLL 'EM ALL XD on serious note, Jai..I love all those .5 chapters. It helps me to understand the character and the story development even more ^_^ and not to mention..more materials for me to read~ :3

thanks, thats exactly what i wanted to do with em. explore there units lives before i go forward.

and if you need bad ass songs to get you ready for the mecha fighting action that is to come soon.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KE51Fy_tHdc

Sadly I can't afford to open youtube..-using mobile data to survive this past month-

Hehe I am finally is fanfiction dragon user.I like my charachter it is like it should be like Yugioh GX Jaden Yuki in Season 3 yugioh GX.Gotcha good fanfiction really.

Quote from: [MK]Jaden on June 08, 2014, 04:05:32 AM

Hehe I am finally is fanfiction dragon user.I like my charachter it is like it should be like Yugioh GX Jaden Yuki in Season 3 yugioh GX.Gotcha good fanfiction really.

He's a happy cheerfull person, but shows a different side in combat, like miwa.

i hope i get to kill someone,somehow they manage to escape me...oh!the .5 chapters are great!your fanfic is unpredictable...i cant even guess... ;)
8)

Quote from: [T.D]Hunter on June 08, 2014, 06:18:46 PM

i hope i get to kill someone,somehow they manage to escape me...oh!the .5 chapters are great!your fanfic is unpredictable...i cant even guess... ;)
8)

really ? i thought it was pretty generic stuff. as for killing you are gonna get some action trying to get that bluaklugar.

but soon there will be allot of violance and deaths as this arc comes to a close in a few chapters.

then off to some revelations after *** explodes and *** falls ** ***. also one of the next .5 chapter will tell the tale of an antagonist's past and i will also try my hand in some omake stories which i hope some of you would want to also make about what ever vanguard related in the Cray Vivire wolds.

umm...whats omake?

Quote from: [T.D]Hunter on June 09, 2014, 11:24:38 AM

umm...whats omake?

maybe im spelling it wrong. its like a supplementary chapter. if you read manga you get these short comedic chapters. like in zettai karen children, there are some before the start of each chapter.

oooh...thank you

Cray Vivire Omake 1

The red warrior is seen walking past a fortune teller.

Teller: Young man would you give me a moment ?

RW: You talking to me ?

Teller: How would you like me to tell your fortune ?

RW: No thanks.

Teller: But wouldn't you like to defeat the angels tomorrow ?

The warrior stops in his tracks and pause for a moment.

RW: No thanks.

Teller: Remember to watch that dog poop in the corner.

The warrior leaves as a minute passes and he returns, dragging his feat on the floor.

RW: Ok how ?

Teller: Did i know ? Gee, could it be i can see the future ?

The omake takes place a little later in the point 5 chapters with an older red warrior, training with some new knights and allot on angel girls.

i will keep them all short and a little strange, funny and sometimes echi.

We open in Garmore's home as he is seen discussing something with Zeviel.

Gar: Please Zev, i can't leave him alone.

Zev: He's not my responsibility

Gar: You know they need me in the war. I can't leave him with anyone else. I think he lost his parents because of this war.

The young boy is seen eaves dropping on the conversation.

Zev: Fine, I will watch him until you get back.

Garmore walks to the young boy and tells him the news.

Gar: Do you understand.

The boy shakes his has in understatement.

Gar: Hey who knows, play your cards right you can be my new little brother.

?: Onii-chan.

Zev: I don't date children.

Gar: I'll be back soon.

I somehow knew, I knew that he wasn't coming back soon enough.

Six month's ago the war between the royal and shadow paladins ended.

Both clans decided to lead an army together, composed of creatures from all around cray.

While all this was going on I spend a comfortable life in the Sanctuary, training to be a knight and living with a beatifull woman.

We cut to an area of the sanctuary one year later, to a house where Zeviel knocking on a door inside.

Zev: Jair, get up its time for class.

Zeviel enters a messed up room full of cloths and books on the floor.

Zev: Get up.

Zev tosses o young man on the ground from his bed.

Get up its time for class.

Jair: Fine I'm up.

It's been two year's since Garmore left fight in the war.

For some reason i expected life to change, but everything's practically the same.

Guess we had nothing to worry about.

The sky turns cloudy in an instant.

Jair: Hmm must be rain.

What little remains of warrior's gather in the Healer Sanctum, to train among the healer's.

Let me tell one thing about living in an area mostly full of female warriors to train with, it is a heavenly hell.

So my life became on of training with friends and enjoying the piece we had...while it stood.

As Jair is seen walking with someone, an emergency patient is seeing being rushed with grate speed to surgery.

His eyes widens as they pass by, Jair turns and runs with great speed behind the floating bed cried by angels.

Jair: NO, no this can't be.

Jair makes it to the surgery room's door but is unable to enter, behind him lands a tearful Zeviel.

Zev: During the war with, what ever it is they fought. It...wiped out so many lives. Aiming for the leaders of the royal paladins, the shadow paladins and the kagero. Our forces retreated.

Zev begins to tear up more as Jair comfort's her.

Zev: I already lost him once. I can't...

Jair: He will live Zeviel.

Cray Vivire

Chapter 6.5

The ties of life.

This is one of the reasons i made .5 chapters. Because once the main story gets this has it would be hard to take the time to explain all of the back story and then go back to the main.

next point chapter we will see the formation of the gold paladins and it might also be the final for The red warriors past.

if i have the energy tomorrow i will wright up chapter 7, which will take time since i wanna make it a little epic.

and dont forget to look out for the omake's also known as shorts stories.

leave some feed.

We open where we left of with Raijin piloting the Stern Blauklugar, his eyes barely able to stay open.

As he is about to close his eyes the alarm goes off.

Raijin: Another one ?

A pair of Grosse Baer attacks him from behind.

Raijin takes evasive action, dodging both shots and fires back destroying both Bear's

Something fires from the ground at Raijin.

Raijin: On the ground. There.

A Gattlingraizer is seen firing at Raijin, but he dodges and fires back destroying it.

Raijin: I don't know how much longer I can last like this. Maybe I should...

A flashback showing Jai and Kuri is seen.

I should just give up.

Cray Vivire

Chapter 7

Abram: When you told me you could get me one of the most powerfull machines in all of Cray. I took no time transferring the money to you.

Ravager is seen on a giant screen.

Ravager: Well I'm sorry it's not my fault that someone stole the stern.
Never the less I am a man of my word. I shall send you a machine and a new team member. All for free of-course.

Abram: Very well, I gratingly accept your offer. Thank you for your time.

Ravager: Not a problem.

The screen shuts off.

Ravager: Stupid gamer. Spending so much money on something he can't even hold in the real world. Hmm, I wonder how that noob got a hold of the stern in the first place ?

We go back to the ship.

Kuri: You can't trust him you know ?

Abram: I don't Ravager's trust, all i need is his supply. He might be a terrible human being, but he is a trust-wordy business man.

Kuri is clearly upset with Abram's actions, but remain's silent.

Jaden: Man this is boring huh ? I mean here I thought we were just gonna crush everyone, not worm our way to the top.

Jaden closes in on Kuri to whisper something in her ear, he then leaves with Kuri showing an unchanged face.

Raijin: So tired.

Raijin Flashes back to the day Arena Adventure began, landing in an area full of metal like a factory.

Raijin: Wow, this is wicked. No gravity too. Guy's how awesome is... ?

Raijin looks around seeing no one in the area.

Raijin: O right its just me.

a tentacle sneak's up on on Raijin as he transforms taking the form of Transmigrating Evolution, Miraioh.

Raijin: Ahh, no this is the least manly way to die!!!

From the shadows appear Screamin' and Dancin' Announcer, Shout.

Raijin Aaaaaaa, no not there. No,no,DIE!!!

Raijin fires at Shout, blowing him up.

Raijin: Ewww now hes all over me.

Man: You, boy.

An old man is seen calling to Raijin, waving at him to come over.

Man: Do you desire great power.

Raijin: And get my uncle killed. No thank you.

The man drags Rajiin by his arm.

Raijin: Hey what are... ? Whoa.

In the next room stands a Giant Stern Blaukluger.

man: There are dangerous people after this machine. With it you will have amazing power, enough to stand against anyone that threatens you...or your friends.

The float in the zero gravity all the way to the cockpit.

Man: Take it, and find them.

A shot is fired hitting the oldman as he falls into Raijin's arms.

Raijin: No!!!.

A man in black is seen entering the room as the oldman pushes Raijin into the armor.

man: Go, go and unite... with those that stand by you.

Raijin: wait !!!

The cockpit closes as the stern activates.

Raijin is clearly dis-trout as tries hover in the machine.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BnaC0RgEPCw

Raijin: Oldman, I might not know why you wanted me to have this machine, but...

The light in the sterns eyes turn on.

Raijin: I will PROTECT IT !!!.

Stern takes off as a hatch opens revealing it to be in a space station close to the planets Suface.

Man in black: Are you sure that was wise, STT Mystic ?

STT Mystic: O vlad, what kind of mods would we be if we let ravager get away with his plans ?

We return to the present as Raijin closes his eyes, the stern begins to fall in the forest.

Jai: Look!!

Zara: Is that a Stern Blauklugar ? Why would it be falling ?

Jai: (This feeling I have, what is it ?)

Hunter: Abram, The eagle has landed.

To Be Continued.

Next the gang meets up and a schism falls hard.

also lets not forget the rise of the machines is coming.

leave a feed back and let me know what you think of the lastest chapter.

i like the song... ;D

Cardfight Vivire Omake 2.

We open on dying planet as two blue skinned people, one man and one woman are seen near a rocket.

Inside the rocket is a young infant boy.

Father: goodbye my son, my hopes and dreams travel with you with you.

The rocket takes off into the sky leaving the planet.

Mother: He will be an outcast. They'll kill him.

Father: No, he will be a god to them.

The flash forward to the baby as a blue skinned adult on a fishing boat.

We see him saving people from an oil rig.

Shinning Lady: How do you find someone thats been hiding his whole live. For some he was a guardian angel, for others a ghost who never fit in.

Father: You will give the people of Cray something to strive for. In time you will help them accomplish wonders.

We see Mr.Invincible take his first flight, insert them song.

Cosmo Lord: You believe your son is safe ? I WILL FIND HIM !!!.

Dananananaaaanaaaana dananana bababababababuuuuuuuuuu.

Mr.Invincible: My father believed if the world found out what i really was, it'll reject. He was convinced that the world wasnt ready. What do you think ?

He see flashes of the upcoming fights.

Shinning lady: What does the I stand for ?

Mr.Invincible: What I ?

Shinning Lady: The one on your chest.

Mr.Inivincible: This isn't an I, it's my natural skin.

We see flashes of Mr invincible punching cosmo lord.

Man Of Invincibility

In threaders Now.

Also in IMAX and 3D

It is Omake, it's like a bonus or improvised chapter ^^
Needs moar Yata o3o

We open threw the eyes of someone waking up from a hospital bed.

He tries to get up but struggles too do so, using the IV holder for support.

The man begins to slowly walk in pain to the door. He opens it and walks to the other side.

Outside he sees Jair and Zeviel both asleep next to one another.

He list's his head allowing us to see the reflection of Garmore.

He takes some time to look at himself, seeing how much damaged he has suffered .

He then looks at his sister and his ward, how they both sleep with worried expressions on there faces.

He smiles thinking to himself "They're gonna be pretty mad at me soon".

Slowly he begins to walk to the outside door vanishing into the dark.

Come morning we see Jair slowly opens his eyes. He get's up cautions of Zeviel next to him, he walks into Garmore's room.

Jair: Gar!

He quickly moves to the nurse's station asking where his friend is.

The Nurses quickly head towards the monitor room. On screen they see Garmore leaving the hospital.

Both Jair and Zeviel begin to leave.

Jair: Any clue where he's going.

Zev: I'm guessing you don' ether.

A few of the knights in angel in training are seen in-front of the hospital with a news paper in hand.

On it states that there will be a press conference addressing every living person in the Sanctuary.

Aina: And its at noon today. We thought since no one has seen you go home since yesterday, you guys must still be here.

Jai: It's in two hours. Thanks guys.

Both Jai and zeviel take off.

We cut to a wide open area full of people from around the sanctuary with a man covered in a cloak walking out on a balcony high above.

Gar: Citizen's of the United Sanctuary, today I bring you the worse kind of news i can.

Day's ago an army composed of every nation in Cray lead by both the Royal Paladins and the Shadow Paladins, engaged the most dangerous foe that has ever appeared.

During the battle the leaders of both paladin factions as well as the kagero's where up-ducted by out foe's along with a majority of there clansmen, including out own king.

Look up, Look at our dark sky's. This is only the beginning. Soon our ground will dry up, our crops will wither and die, our people will be captured and transformed into a weapon for our enemies.

Unless we stop this here and now.

Garmore removes his cloak to show that he is wearing a golden armor with a wolf like appearance.

Gar: This is only one of our new hope, sacred armors hidden away long ago. These armor will choose there own wielders who will become leaders in my new army, THE GOLD PALADINS !!!

I here by ask the remaining soldiers of the royal paladins to join me in my quest to liberate our fellow knight's from captivity.

And I also ask that those of the shadow paladins to please join us in out fight for our comrades.

Those who join is will receive a pardon for there past crimes against the Sanctuary.

Now who will join my cause ?

Cray Vivire

Chapter 7.5 A GOLDEN ARMY.

The red warrior, or the be most specific the saga around garmore's past has ended, while the red warrior's might end next chapter.

but dont be alarmed because the .5 chapters arnt ending soon enough. we still have plenty to explore in the past of Cray Vivire.

leave a feedback.

Quote from: ヤタ on June 13, 2014, 12:56:32 PM

It is Omake, it's like a bonus or improvised chapter ^^
Needs moar Yata o3o

i had some plans to write a few with your flamboyant character going more and more into a hard gay/musscle okama style.

but there not coming anytime soon if im to tired to write em.

if you wanna take a wake at writting something of your own just give me a heads up and i will let you post it.

Quote from: "infamous" Jai Of Hearts on June 13, 2014, 01:04:53 PM

Quote from: ヤタ on June 13, 2014, 12:56:32 PM
It is Omake, it's like a bonus or improvised chapter ^^
Needs moar Yata o3o

i had some plans to write a few with your flamboyant character going more and more into a hard gay/musscle okama style.

but there not coming anytime soon if im to tired to write em.

if you wanna take a wake at writting something of your own just give me a heads up and i will let you post it.

Did I mention infinite hell?
Yeah you're going to infinite hell :V

truth be told i wanted to make a character kind of like musscle okama from zettai karen children and pepillion from buso renkin.

Only used you cuss i respect you and i need someone that really cares for people to emulate who that character is.

a caring person with a heart of gold and a showmen ship unlike any other.

did i mention you will be involve more in later chapters ?

So till now the only character you've really screwed over was mine....GREAT

Quote from: Ellinopoulo on June 13, 2014, 01:20:37 PM

So till now the only character you've really screwed over was mine....GREAT

no you did that yourself.

Please explain how I told you to make him a pessimistic idiot who hates everything and is well emo with psychological problems and has daily thought about cutting people

Cray Vivire Omake 3

we open to the Fortune telling from Omake 1 sitting at her regular station.

Jair: You tricked me !!!

Hours earlier at the training ground Crimson Drive, Aphrodite is seen taunting Jair.

Dite: Ha, do you believe a weakling like you can best me ?

Spectators: Is he crazy picking a fight with Aphrodite.
That guy must have a death wish.

Shanks: Jair once she kills you can i live with Zeviel ?

Jair: Go to hell, shanks !!!

(Side note: Shanks is Radiant Adventurer, Shanks. Who Jai used his form ealier on)

Judge: Begin.

Both take there battle stances as they leer at each other with piercing eyes.

Jair:( This is hand to hand combat. I should have the advantage since she's mostly a magic user. And I know the future.)

Jair Charges at Aphrodite, dodging her moves as if he knows what shes gonna trow before she trows it.

She tries to hit Jair in the chest but he grabs her arm and tosses her over his shoulder.

As the dust settle on Jair we see him on top of Ahprodite with a smile... and groping her breast as she blushes in confusion.

Teller: And ?

Jair: Every move you thought me ended in me groping her. I'm probably marked as a pervert now because of you.

Teller: Hmm, tell me how she acts the next day.

Jair: What ?

Teller: Come back tomorrow and tell me how she acts thwarts you.

Jair is clearly mad at the fortune teller, but decides to walk away.

THE NEXT DAY.

Teller: Ahh good evening. How are you today ?

Jair: How is that possible ? She was extremely nice to men, in a kinda tsundere type way. She even wanted me to call her dite. How is that possible ?

Teller: Do you doubt me now ?

Jair: How can i be sure this isn't a trick ?

Teller: Really ? Let me check my crystal ball. Ahh, ooooo, aaaaahh.

The crystal ball sines showing the tellers leg pressing a button.

Teller: Do you know of Crimson Impact, Metatron

Jair: Yes, commanding officer of Crimson Nursewind

Teller: She's not to happy with you, for a better word "seduced" one of her comrades. Shes coming for you. Warrior ?

We flash to Jair in his room writing his Will.

Who is the teller ? Its someone we all know.

Will it all be a basic sim date game for Jair ? Maybe not so basic.

Will i ever write a good omake ? Never.

stay tuned, same cray time, same cray channel.

Next up When hunter attacks.

We open in the forest area where the stern has crashed.

Jai: I don't see anyone around.

Zara: Of Course you don't, any decent person that hiding and waiting is the best option.

Jai: But can't we take it for ourselves ? With that kind of firepower...

Zara: We would be freaking huge targets. Now sit down and be quiet.

Hunter: I have a better idea. Why don't the two of you get use slowly and hand over your card ?

The Original Cardfight-wiki.ru Fan fiction

Cray Vivire

Chapter 8

Jai and Zara looked at each other, turned and leaped backwards away from hunter who is not in-front of them.

Jai: Now i don't know about you Zara, but i like our odds.

Hunter: And that would be ?

Behind Hunter emerges a Demon World Marquis, Amon from the woods.

Both Jai and Zara look at it with unchanged faces.

Zara: Odds still seems in our favor little man.

Jai: Hey am I the only one wondering how he has a crossbow ?

Hunter: Made it myself.

Jai: Wow that is really cool.

Hunter: You think so ?

Jai charger at Hunter taking the from of Shining Lancer , The Radiant and Zara at amon taking the from of Fang Light Celestial, Zeviel.

Zara: Eat Trident you ugly s.o.b.

Hunter tries to shoot his crossbow at Jai, but the string breaks.

Hunter: Piece of crap.

He tosses the crossbow aside and takes a battle stands.

Jai spear's him in the legs making him knee to the ground screaming in pain.

Jai: don't feel bad, same thing happened to Ned Stark. Now you have any final words ?

Hunter: Yes, what did you mention about odds ?

Jai: Say wut now ?

Abram: Attention male and female fighter duo, place lay down your arms and surrender. If you do now comply we will be forced to open fire.

Jai: There are spaceships in ... ? Why do i still get surprised by this game ?

We see Abram in his ship repeating his message as a shocked Kuri looks on.

Kuri: Jai, you're still here ?

Jai: What do we do ?

Zara lays down her cards and reverts back to her normal form.

Zara: We play by there rules, for now.

We see a bunch of men attempting to open the stern in many forms of many units.

Man: It's no good. We are unable to open it.

We see Abram in his chair on-board his ship talking to his men outside via video call.

Abram: I see, then pick it up with your dragons and bring it inside. hmm ? Jaden.

Jaden: Sir.

Abram: Bring our two guests to the dinning hall. I believe they could use some food.

We see Jaden in the prison ward with several men opening the door to Jai and Zara's cells.

Jaden: The Captain wants to see you two.

Zara: Hands off.

Zara and Jai enters a room with a table full of food and drink.

Abram: Welcome, please sit down and enjoy the refreshments.

Zara: And what makes you think we would accept anything you have to offer.

Abram: Your friend there seems to disagree with you.

We see Jai shoving food down his throat with no hesitation.

Jai: what ? I'm not questioning anything about this game anymore.

Abram: It's unusually rare to see one, let alone a pair of two fighters still on there own. But you two have survived long enough to prove that you are great fighters. But there is so much you can do all by yourselves.

Jai: And you want us to join you ?

Abram: Smart man. The current law in cardfight Arena care only for there own self interests,Proving that the game of no longer a place for the free and the happy, but the rich and envious. But together we can remove the rotten Karma that has infested Arena that very day they decided to install the ranking system.

Abram walks to where Jai and Zara sits, he extends his arm to Zara.

Abram: Join me in reincarnating the way people see our game. Ones i become a mod i will help those who helped me reach the same power, until we outnumber ever the seven.

....

Zara: Jai, you heard enough ?

Jai: I there say i have.

Zara: Shall we give him our answer.

Jai: Let's.

Both Jai and Zara stand up and transform, revealing to have hidden cards on themselves.

Jai taking the form of Incandescent Lion, Blond Ezel and Zara that of Prophecy Celestial, Ramiel.

Zara grabs Abram and sets her blade on his throat.

Jaden, Hunter and Maya, allong with many men enters the room pointing there arms at the duo as they hide behind Abram.

Jai: Looks like we just entered the, DANGER ZONE.

Kuri is at the door looking inside and pondering what she can do.

Abram: A simple no would have been enough for me to let you go.

Zara: But this is so much more exiting.

Jai: There a bunch of grade one's and zero's they can't do anything to us.

Hunter: O really ? You trap'ed in a tiny room with no other way out. Between you and the door about two other grade 3 user.
Now add all those useless grade one's and zero's.

We get a look at both parties as they stare off.

Hunter: Now What should we do with the two of you ?

Kuri: You're gonna let em go.

Kuri stand's holding a blade to Maya's throat.

Kuri: Or the boss' play thing loses her head.

Hunter: What do you think you're doing ? You think we're gonna let them and you go because of on little girl ?

Abram: Hunter wait. Do what they say

Hunter: What ?

Abram: Do as i say or you won't get paid !

A wide grin appears on hunter's face.

Hunter:...you already transferred the cash.

Hunter transforms into Blade Wing Reijy and tries to attack Kuri.

Jaden taking the form of Dragon Monk, Goku stabs him in the back.

Hunter: You little !

Jaden: Should have followed orders like a good merc and use less mouth.

Hunter: You...will...pay.

Hunter disappears leaving a card behind. Jaden picks up the card and begins to smell.

Jaden: Now this is a nice get. Hey Kuri, where were you gonna go after this ? I mean you can't hide in the woods or anything.
With this ship be kind find you almost anywhere around here.

Kuri: I, would have thought of something.

Jaden: HA, you just wanted to save your boyfriend so you acted without thinking.

Kuri: You think that's my boyfriend.

Jai: Ouch my heart.

Jaden: Fine then, you leave me no choice.

Jaden points his spear at Kuri, who still holds Maya captive.

TO BE CONTINUED

if you like the series so far and want another chapter soon say judge.

if i get 5 judge i will write the next one.

Why do you act like I would?

I like my charachter but maybe a little it could be more serious.

Quote from: [MK]Jaden on June 15, 2014, 07:05:11 AM

I like my charachter but maybe a little it could be more serious.

you read the last chapter right ?

then you know your character has more to come.

Nice fanfic dude. Favs part was when Garmore was young... I hope you goes on and on with it!

Quote from: AxelForce on June 17, 2014, 08:29:20 PM

Nice fanfic dude. Favs part was when Garmore was young... I hope you goes on and on with it!

well im almost done with volume 2 and the .5 chapter will shift to another important character in the cray vivire verse.

be warned volume 2 will end big.

as for vol 3 it might not be as long as vol 2 was but it will be important, while vol 4 will the biggest one.

and if i have free time i will make a 5th vol which will be totally different from the first 4 but will be more enjoyable.

Great to hear that, cant wait to read more about it!

Quote from: AxelForce on June 17, 2014, 09:51:37 PM

Great to hear that, cant wait to read more about it!

ill post some more tomorrow if im not tired, hearing that someones is reading helps.

even if my char is dead...i'll still read it...my ego has killed me and...argh...Jaden is so cool...and i feel like killing anyone in my mind...nice story...

Quote from: [T.D]Hunter on June 18, 2014, 05:33:12 AM

even if my char is dead...i'll still read it...my ego has killed me and...argh...Jaden is so cool...and i feel like killing anyone in my mind...nice story...

i would like to remind you they are in a virtual world. that will be all for now.

We open in the training area next the sanctum where the angels and the knights train as Jair fights an unknown person, knocking him to the floor.

Jair: Next.

Everyone looks around, but non of them wants to spar with him.

It's been months since Garmore left with his Gold Paladins, now lead by a new knight with golden hair like a lion.

Then one by one more forces from each section of the Sanctuary where send to battle, leaving only the youngest warriors to train and the oldest warriors to instruct them.

Name: Man why does he look so mad today ?

Aina: Well his wife left him yesterday.

Name: Right the angels where the last one to leave. No wonder hes so...

Aina: Unbalanced ?

Name: I was gonna say upset.

We see Jair toss another warrior to the ground.

Name: But unbalanced seems to fit.

Jair: Now I'm ready for swords.

Every close to the training field backs up as Jair unseats a sword.

We zoom out in the distance to see an man next to a young female.

Arthuria: Father why would you would you wan't me to take them ?

Pendragon: They are the future, the Child from the Name clan Joseph Name, Aina of music armament corps and The young knight with a sea of potential Jair.

Arthuria: A pampered child, an elf and a tempered child. This will be my army ?

Pendragon: Don't forget yourself, my narcissistic daughter. Every leader has to start from somewhere.

We see Jair, Aina and Name at the front-gate of the Sanctuary.

Arthuria: Thank you all for meeting me here, I am Arthuria and I will be your leader for this mission. As you may know All of our main forces are engaged in a war against our unknown foe leaving a great portion of our nation virtually undefended.
That includes the Sacred Volt.

Aina: Whats the Sacred Volt ?

Arthuria: Tell me first how much you know about the Sacred Beast Armor's ?

Everyone remains silent.

Arthuria: *signs* Figures.

Jair: In the middle of the United Sanctuary and Dragon Empire there is an almost endless dungeon filled with many many armaments that can not be used, but the truth is they must choose there own wielders.

Arthuria: Correct. There have been sightings or thieves heading there. Our mission is to capture them.

We see a glimpse of the thieves with demon like appearance walking in a ruined area, in one of there sacks an egg.

Arthuria: Do you all except this mission ?

Cray Vivire

Chapter 8.5

The end...

We see a mansion on-top a mountain with a male elf with pale skin looking outside threw a window.

...for now

while i might not show all of there missions, i can tell you that the knights that have left will have some awesome ones.

for now i will show the tale of vivire's shadow user's ace.

next up chapter 9 aka one chapter away from more gundam action with 600% more guns.

A great way of getting this to be more neatly organized is if you put each chapter as a Spoiler and title it with the above like so:
Chapter 1- The Beginning

Spoiler

This is Chapter 1

Chapter 2 - The End

Spoiler

In here goes Chapter 2

Doing this would make it much more appealing to the eye, and that way we don't have to go hunting for your posts on this thread. Whenever you make a new chapter or page, just update it on the main page and bump this post by saying-- "Chapter X is out. Check it out!"

after my character defeat in the hands of jaden...im thinking of a story for him...but i dont know how to tell it to ya'll...so it will be in my mind

Quote from: [T.D]Hunter on June 19, 2014, 05:17:55 AM

after my character defeat in the hands of jaden...im thinking of a story for him...but i dont know how to tell it to ya'll...so it will be in my mind

i m not spoiling anything to anyone.

just how can i do that ?

Quote from: [T.CC] "The infamous" Jai on June 19, 2014, 07:35:23 AM

just how can i do that ?

Title goes here
Type out [rspoiler] Copy and Paste your chapter here [/rspoiler ]

Remove the (R) in the spoiler brackets to obtain the spoiler.
End result should look like this:
Chapter 8.5

Spoiler

We open in the training area next the sanctum where the angels and the knights train as Jair fights an unknown person, knocking him to the floor.

Jair: Next.

Everyone looks around, but non of them wants to spar with him.

It's been months since Garmore left with his Gold Paladins, now lead by a new knight with golden hair like a lion.

Then one by one more forces from each section of the Sanctuary where send to battle, leaving only the youngest warriors to train and the oldest warriors to instruct them.

Name: Man why does he look so mad today ?

Aina: Well his wife left him yesterday.

Name: Right the angels where the last one to leave. No wonder hes so...

Aina: Unbalanced ?

Name: I was gonna say upset.

We see Jair toss another warrior to the ground.

Name: But unbalanced seems to fit.

Jair: Now I'm ready for swords.

Every close to the training field backs up as Jair unseats a sword.

We zoom out in the distance to see an man next to a young female.

Arthuria: Father why would you would you wan't me to take them ?

Pendragon: They are the future, the Child from the Name clan Joseph Name, Aina of music armament corps and The young knight with a sea of potential Jair.

Arthuria: A pampered child, an elf and a tempered child. This will be my army ?

Pendragon: Don't forget yourself, my narcissistic daughter. Every leader has to start from somewhere.

We see Jair, Aina and Name at the front-gate of the Sanctuary.

Arthuria: Thank you all for meeting me here, I am Arthuria and I will be your leader for this mission. As you may know All of our main forces are engaged in a war against our unknown foe leaving a great portion of our nation virtually undefended.
That includes the Sacred Volt.

Aina: Whats the Sacred Volt ?

Arthuria: Tell me first how much you know about the Sacred Beast Armor's ?

Everyone remains silent.

Arthuria: *signs* Figures.

Jair: In the middle of the United Sanctuary and Dragon Empire there is an almost endless dungeon filled with many many armaments that can not be used, but the truth is they must choose there own wielders.

Arthuria: Correct. There have been sightings or thieves heading there. Our mission is to capture them.

We see a glimpse of the thieves with demon like appearance walking in a ruined area, in one of there sacks an egg.

Arthuria: Do you all except this mission ?

Cray Vivire

Chapter 8.5

The end...

We see a mansion on-top a mountain with a male elf with pale skin looking outside threw a window.

...for now

Quote from: Just on June 19, 2014, 01:11:09 PM

Quote from: [T.CC] "The infamous" Jai on June 19, 2014, 07:35:23 AM
just how can i do that ?

Title goes here
Type out [rspoiler] Copy and Paste your chapter here [/rspoiler ]

Remove the (R) in the spoiler brackets to obtain the spoiler.
End result should look like this:
Chapter 8.5
Spoiler
We open in the training area next the sanctum where the angels and the knights train as Jair fights an unknown person, knocking him to the floor.

Jair: Next.

Everyone looks around, but non of them wants to spar with him.

It's been months since Garmore left with his Gold Paladins, now lead by a new knight with golden hair like a lion.

Then one by one more forces from each section of the Sanctuary where send to battle, leaving only the youngest warriors to train and the oldest warriors to instruct them.

Name: Man why does he look so mad today ?

Aina: Well his wife left him yesterday.

Name: Right the angels where the last one to leave. No wonder hes so...

Aina: Unbalanced ?

Name: I was gonna say upset.

We see Jair toss another warrior to the ground.

Name: But unbalanced seems to fit.

Jair: Now I'm ready for swords.

Every close to the training field backs up as Jair unseats a sword.

We zoom out in the distance to see an man next to a young female.

Arthuria: Father why would you would you wan't me to take them ?

Pendragon: They are the future, the Child from the Name clan Joseph Name, Aina of music armament corps and The young knight with a sea of potential Jair.

Arthuria: A pampered child, an elf and a tempered child. This will be my army ?

Pendragon: Don't forget yourself, my narcissistic daughter. Every leader has to start from somewhere.

We see Jair, Aina and Name at the front-gate of the Sanctuary.

Arthuria: Thank you all for meeting me here, I am Arthuria and I will be your leader for this mission. As you may know All of our main forces are engaged in a war against our unknown foe leaving a great portion of our nation virtually undefended.
That includes the Sacred Volt.

Aina: Whats the Sacred Volt ?

Arthuria: Tell me first how much you know about the Sacred Beast Armor's ?

Everyone remains silent.

Arthuria: *signs* Figures.

Jair: In the middle of the United Sanctuary and Dragon Empire there is an almost endless dungeon filled with many many armaments that can not be used, but the truth is they must choose there own wielders.

Arthuria: Correct. There have been sightings or thieves heading there. Our mission is to capture them.

We see a glimpse of the thieves with demon like appearance walking in a ruined area, in one of there sacks an egg.

Arthuria: Do you all except this mission ?

Cray Vivire

Chapter 8.5

The end...

We see a mansion on-top a mountain with a male elf with pale skin looking outside threw a window.

...for now

thanks i will try to set all the chapters on one page

Spoiler

We open to a black colored robot flying in the sky, we see inside Ravager on a tv screen.

Ravager: Do you understand your mission ? You are to help Abram's team get to the goal.
Once you reached the goal you are to remport back to me.

Pilot:...

We see the black colored robot fly off into the blue sky.

Cray Vivire

Chapter 9

We return to Abram's ship where Jai and Zara hold Abram hostage, while Kuri also holds Maya hostage.

Jaden pointing his spear at Kuri shoots her a glare.

Jaden: You really are hopeless huh. No idea, no rationality. All you wan't to do is fight for him.

He said pointing the speak at Jai.

Kuri: Yea.

Jaden: O well. Abram.

Jaden turn's to look at Abram.

Jaden: I quit !

Jaden tosses the spear hitting Abram in the chest.

He grabs a walky-talky from his side and sets it to hes mouth.

Jaden: Attention all crew member, it's danga zone time !!!

Suddenly multiple crew members strike one another down.

Kuri: Jaden.

Jaden: Don't get me wrong i needed to do this sooner or later.

He said shooting Kuri a jubilus smile.

Both Jai and Zara stand stunned, unknown to what is currently happening.

Jai: What the heck is going on ?

We flashback to Jaden whispering into Kuri's ear.

Jaden: Meet me in the hanger at 8.

Kuri enters the hanger area of the shop which holds multiple robot like machines.

Jaden: you like em ? There all different machines the Captain bought from Ravager.
It's not a bad idea you know ? Seeing how this isn't a cardgame the guy with the biggest guns always win.

Kuri: Why did you call me here Jaden.

Jaden: Kuri, come on its me. Why can't you call me Jay ?

Kuri:...

Jaden: O right, you already have a Jay.

Kuri:...

Jaden: See Iiiiii always hated our so-called leader. He always sends everyone else to there death's. If someone weakness there opponents enough he kills them instead, taking everything for himself.

Kuri: Then how are you so strong.

Jaden: I was already strong when he found me. The thing i hate the most is he uses the people he's spouse help. The men are his personal maids, while the women...his toys.

Kuri: You want me to help you bring him down.

Jaden: Eeeeh, wrong.

We return to the present.

Jaden: All right my matey's. This ship is now under the rule of the not cute,flat-chested, un-girly like Capt.Kuri !!!

Kuri: I will murder you in your sleep.

Jaden: Did i mention she's a yandere folks ?

Abram is on the floor crawling.

Abram: You little snot's, you will rule the day you messed with me. DO YOU HEAR ME.

Maya kick's Abram in his wound.

Maya: Shut up and die you perverted old man.

Everyone else: What a personality change.

Maya: Jaaay.

Jai: Who me ?

Maya runs into the arms of Jaden.

Maya: I was so worried that you would get hurt.

Jaden: Dummy, I told you i would save you.

Everyone: Awww.

Jai: Wait, anyone else suddenly feel weaker ?

We see Abram on the floor slowly transforming.

Abram: Kill you, KILL...YOU...ALL.

Jaden: O nerdz, we need to get him outside !!!!

Zara tries to stab Abram, but the blade will not penetrate no matter how much she forces it.

Zara: We should get him outside.

We see everyone that was in the room carry a slowly transforming blob of flesh.

Jai: Why is he taking so long to change.

Kuri: Because if he changes in here he would take out the ship with him and his only solid ground for few hundred feet.

They take Abram to the hanger and back away from him.

Abram transforms into Galactic Beast, Zeal.

Zara: No wonder we got so weak. He's draining us !!

Abram: Ahhhhhh!!!

Kuri: Attack !!!

Everyone attacks Abram doing almost no damage.

We see Maya pauses for one costly second.

Abram: Maya !!!!

Abram prepares to fire an energy beam from his face when suddenly Jai and Jaden stabs him in the face.

Jaden: Nice going Jai.

Jai: You two Jaden.

FEEL THAT BROMANCE.

Abram gets back up preparing to fire.

Everyone trying to fight but are visibly to weakened to stand.

Jai: Nice knowing you bro.

Jaden: And you too man.

FEEL THAT BROMANCE.

As Abram is about to fire his beam, another beam of light fire threw him killing him.

Everyone turns to see the Stern activated.

Raijin: The power of bromance, HAS REVITALIZED ME !!!!!*faint's*

We move to the sick bay where we see Raijin waking up and next to his bed stands Jai and Kuri.

Jai: Welcome back to the world of the living.

Raijin: Hey guy's, I had the weirdest dream and you where in it, and you, and you, and you.

He say's pointing at everyone in the room.

Raijin: What happened ?

Kuri: It's a long story.

The piece is quickly broken by an announcement alert.

Announcer: Attention, attention. Capt.Kuri please report to the main deck immediately.

Kuri: Now what ? What's wrong ?

Female: It's a mobile suit, close by.

Kuri: It must be the machine Ravager send over.
Open communications. Attention pilot i am vice capt.Kuri, can you respond.

?: I was ordered to only make contact with Abram.

We hear a machine like voice.

Kuri: He's currently entertaining female guests. You will have to talk to me.

?:..I will only talk to Abram.

Kuri: Listen to me. If you do not land your suit we will consider you hostile and open fire.

?...very well.

Female: Communications have been cut.

Kuri: Do we have anyone that can pilot those suits ?

Jaden: Only one of them still works. The rest are too damaged beyond repair.
However we where able to upgrade the new blau we got and best of all we have an experienced pilot onboard.

Kuri: No I won't send Raijin into battle.

Raijin: Then it's a good thing you don't have to.

Both Jai, Zara and Raijin enter the room.

Kuri: Well I object.

Raijin: OVERRULED !!! Even halve dead I'm a better pilot then anyone in this ship, and your telling me to sit back ? Hell no Cap.

Kuri:...fine. Ensign Raijin get to your station.

Raijin: Ensign ? *he said with a smile on his face*

We see Raijin getting into an upgraded Blau as the rest look on at a screen.

Female: It's here.

Kuri: Raijin !!!

Raijin: You got it !!! GALAXY BLAUKLUGAR, TAKING OFF.

We see the galaxy powering up and launching.

Raijin: Woohooo.

TO BE EPIC

special thansk to just for the new spoiler bar ideas, i will start setting the chapters on the first page when i have the time.

Next week its gonna be more about action action freaking mecha fight action, as volume 2 slowly comes to a close.

leave a feedback and if you want your character to be in this fanfic just ask, however you might not appear anytime soon *caught*lancer*caught*.

As always nice chapter man... and I'll take on that offer, I'm asking you if I can be a character on that.. I dont know what that implied tho..

nice chapter...i like the BROMANCE!Feel the BROMANCE!

Quote from: [T.CC] "The infamous" Jai on June 19, 2014, 09:09:51 PM

Special thanks to Just for the new spoiler bar ideas, I will start setting the chapters on the first page when I have the time.

Next week its gonna be more about action action freaking mecha fight action, as volume 2 slowly comes to a close.

Leave a feedback and if you want your character to be in this fanfic just ask, however you might not appear anytime soon *cough*lancer*cough*.

>_> You said I'd be getting a cameo this volume... Doesn't that count as "anytime soon" ? (also took the liberty of fixing your mistakes in the post-chapter. See how much better and more professional it looks now? That's why you should get a proofreader.)

Quote from: [T.CC]Axs on June 19, 2014, 09:18:07 PM

As always nice chapter man... and I'll take on that offer, I'm asking you if I can be a character on that.. I dont know what that implied tho..

nether do i, but i never know where my creative process with take me.

if you have some interesting ideas for your character pm them to me, mostly try thinking of a character type that doesnt excist yet in cray vivire.

lance wait and see.

also whats a proofreader?

ok ive set all the current chapters on the first page and the all the ones that are coming i will set there.

i will post new chapters on the last page, however i will modify my old messages to add then to them.

A proofreader Jai, is someone who reads over another person's writing (or their own), and fixes all the incorrect typographical errors and mistakes in grammar, style, and spelling. (just copy pasted that last part because I loved that explanation)

In other words, he wants you to have someone fix all of the mistakes in your writing. (Since your writing capabilities right now are mostly on the creative side and not on the grammatically correct side)

P.S: Thanks for putting all of your writing in the first page now!
If you add colors and bold the titles for the chapters, it'd look really neat. Maybe add a little picture at the bottom of it too so that people can have an idea of the world they're about to enter! :D

Proofreading Page(To help you) (https://writing.wisc.edu/Handbook/Proofreading.html)

sadly just i have no art ability but i would love to set an image.

but if someone would help me out with one would be good.

as for editing the color i will do that some other time, maybe i should send it to seiryuu since he already offered to do spell check for me.

(http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-IDQTygloEmk/UdeORsRMZQI/AAAAAAAADcw/16rkVllQSQc/s1600/Cardfight%2521%2521.Vanguard+%255BAnimefullfights.com%255D+%25284%2529.jpg)

maybe this one if someone can help me out and putt a good sign on it ?

(http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-jWN_3pXYGP8/UP8SDbTcIGI/AAAAAAAAAMA/TBfgB8um3rQ/s1600/CFV_Banner2.jpg)

Try this. It's much smaller and wider-- don't use such a huge picture xD.
I suggest you put it at the bottom of your main page to make it look much neater.

i posted the bigger one hoping someone and add the sign CRAY
vivire

when im back...all will be locked and punished...muahaha

Spoiler

We open at an airport as cherry blossom petals float in the air, a Kuri stand's awaiting someone.

Kuri: It has been so many years since I have seen my best friend Yata.

*Flash back to the past where we see little Yata and Kuri playing in the sand*

Kuri: We used to be inseparable since we where in diapers.
We used to spend every day together up until the day he moved away.
I never told him but i always-ed cared for him, maybe now that we're both older i can finally tell him how i feel.

Yata: Wow its been such a long time

Kuri turns around to see the current Yata which looks something like this:
(http://1-media-cdn.foolz.us/ffuuka/board/a/image/1358/19/1358199915164.gif)

Yata: Kuri darling. <3

Kuri: Eh.....THE WORLD HAS FAILED ME!!!

Cray Vivire Omake 4

Hahaha...that look...

Chapter 10

Spoiler

We open in the sky as the black robot flies at the ship.

We see something launching from the ship with grate speed heading up into the air.

With the sun behind the object it is almost impossible to see a beam shooting down.

The black robot quickly dodges beam, as its head looks up into the sky.

Raijin: Let's go Free...I mean Galaxy !

[video] https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Bv_etp_N_E0 [/video]

The two machines engage in an epic battle as they cross swords.

Female: The Galaxy has engaged the enemy.

Male: Target appears to the very versatile compared to the Galaxy, your thoughts Captain ?

Kuri: Raijin still has more attacking capability then the enemy. Having funals at his side. (funals are little flying guns)

We see the funels firing at the black robot as one hits it.

The Galaxy rushes in trying to slice it with its beat sword, but the black robot grabs the Galaxy's hand.

Raijin: what.

Kuri: How is that possible.

Male: Target is emitting powerful electro-magnetic-wavelenght's.

Kuri: It's doing what now?

The black robot shines with a bright yellow light as it transforms.

Kuri: What the hell is that thing ?

Maya: Banshee. That's what that pervert called it.

Kuri: Then that makes it, Blau Banshee Norn.

Kuri seems puzzled as to what to do next.

Kuri: Jai, get into the unicorn, you're launching.

Jai: But I never pilot a mobile suit before.

Kuri: Ensign Jai get in the freaking machine !!

Jai: Yes sir, I mean mem.

We see Raijin Struggle with the Banshee from afar.

Raijin: Damn, why is it so fast ?

We see Jai at the cockpit of the unicorn.

Jai: Get into the suit she says, does she ask if i know how to pilot it noooo.

Hunter: She sounds like a total nagger.

Jai: Yea i know right ?

Jai turns around to see hunter behind him.

Kuri: Whats taking him so long ?

Female: Sir, we have a situation in the hanger.

We see multiple people with long range weapon pointed at the cockpit where hunter in the from of Blade Wing Reijy holding a blade to Jai's throat.

Jaden: Hey good buddy.

Hunter: You stabbed me in the back.

Jaden: Actually i speared you. How are you still alive anyway ?

Hunter: Shadow clones.

Jai: You can do that ?

Hunter: Well with Devil in Shadow I can.

Jai: That is so awesome.

Hunter: I know right ?

Jaden: I think its awesome too.

Hunter: Shut up you.

Jaden: What are you gonna do now Hunty ? you can't escape from here.

Hunter: Not on my own, but with this mobile suit I can finally reach the mountain top.

Jaden's face turns darker as he prepares to chug his speak.

Jaden: Sorry Jai, but it can't let him leave with that machine.

Jai: I prefer not to die thank you.

Hunter: Even if you kill me I'm just another clone. The real me will always come back to hunt you.

A light arrow hits Hunter in the head, he vanishes immediately.

Zara: No you won't. The fact that He couldn't make an army of himself to attack us all and needing that suit to escape means that that was the real hunter.

Jaden: Dude your girlfriend is hardcore.

Zara: Jai, what are you waiting for ? Get going.

Jai: Right.

Outside in a nearby cave we see a cyber woman looking at the battle.

CW: Cradle operational.

We see behind her in the shadow multiple metal testicles and a cyber man with red eyes.

Jai: Launch preparations complete, detaching from ship !!!!

The Blau Unicorn lunches with a jetpack attacked to its back for flight.

The Unicorn locks on to the Banshee and fire a power full beat missing it only by an inch.

Raijin: Jai, flank him !!!

The Galaxy surrounds the Banshee with every beam it has, leaving it immobilize.

Raijin: That's all I have, Jai shoot it !!!

The Unicorn transforms with a red light glowing from it as it prepares to fire.

Jai: This is it.

Female: UNICORN ABOVE YOU !!!

From above he see a Revenger, Desperate Dragon heading towards the unicorn with Vidi riding on it.

The Dragon Lands on the Unicorn as it fires the guns in its head.

The Dragon rips the cockpit door off.

Vidi: Burn him.

The dragon unleashes black fire in the cockpit burning the pilot.

To Be Continued.

what do you think ?

do you like it ?

do you want more ?

do you want more yata ?

Are you telling me it was going so fast it grated stuff around it?

That was so epic!(if you can imagine it)
Nice story bro...hope you can make it more epic. ;D

Quote from: [T.D]Hunter on June 28, 2014, 01:19:44 AM

That was so epic!(if you can imagine it)
Nice story bro...hope you can make it more epic. ;D

i will try.

but sadly one august begins i wont almost any free time to finish cray vivire.

Chapter 11

Spoiler

We reopen where we left off with Vidi preparing and extra crispy Jai.

Vidi watches the black flames with with no emotion in his eyes.

Vidi: One down.

Jai jumps out of the fire in the form of Radiant Empress of The Saber, Arthuria.

As Jai launches at him Vidi takes the form of Cursed Spear Revenger, Diarmuid.

Jai crashes into Vidi as both fall from the sky, screaming as they plunge.

Female: Captain it appears both Jai and that fighter are falling to there deaths.

Kuri: hmmm. Why is that dragon still out there ?

We see the Revenger, Desperate Dragon flying in the air as the unicorn falls to the ground.

Kuri: If its vanguard isn't close to him. Isn't it suppose to vanish ?

The dragon flies straight for the ship.

Kuri: All hands go to red alert !!! Jaden, can you get the unicorn for me.

Jaden: Captain I think it would be best if i go ahead and engage the enemy myself.

Kuri: How ? You don't have any unit with flight strong enough to take him on.

Jaden: O yee of little fate.

Jaden pulls out a card and shows it to Kuri.

Jaden: A little gift from out old pal Hunter.

The Galaxy and the Banshee continue there mid air battle as it destroys more of the Galaxy's funnels.

Raijin: O crap.

The Banshee quickly closes in on the Galaxy, pointing its gun at the cockpit.

Raijin: NOOOOOO!!!

The camera zooms into Raijins eyes as what appears to be a seed falling to the ground is shown.

The seed explodes in a flash of light as the camera zooms out to show a clear eyed Raijin.

The Galaxy grabs the Banshee's gun and moves it away just when it fires.

The two remaining funnels crash into the Banshee's wings forcing it to fall to the ground.

Back at the ship Revenger, Desperate Dragon closes in on the ship.

We see Maya by herself in the missile room.

Jaden: This is gonna be epic.

Maya: You're crazy.

Jaden: I think the word you are looking for is awesome.

Male: Target in range.

Kuri: On my mark...FIRE IDIOT MISSILE!!!

Jaden is fired like a missile at Desperate Dragon.

Jaden: Looks like this is THE END!!!!

Jaden takes the form of Dragonic Overlord The End stabbing Desperate in both its wings.

It fires flames into Jaden's face, but Jaden slices it's right wing off and shoots at it missing its head as Desperate falls to the ground.

Vidi is seen limping on the ground as he walks to where a fallen Jai lies unconscious.

He raises his lance as he prepares to end Jai.

Vidi: Die like trash.

Vidi parry's, but Jai quicly changes form and putts a gun to Vidi's face.

Jai: Radiant Adventurer, Shanks. Only knight that's also a pirate and one of few to carry a gun.

Jai shoots Vidi in the face as he backs off leaving one of his lance's behind.

Vidi: I admit, that was a good move turning into a swifter form. But alas it was a weaker form.

We see Jai has retaken his previous form.

Jai: We then let's finish this. GANGULAAAAA!!!!

Vidi: AHHHHH!!!

Both Charges at one another at fool force.

Just as both where about to reach each other a huge explosion occurs, causing an earthquake.

Jai: What the heck ?!!!

Vidi: Could this be a special event ?!!

The mountain close to the area erupts as a giant floating machine emerges from it.

Inside we see the cyber woman piloting it.

CW: Targets located.

To Be Concluded.

next issue is the last one where vol 2 will end and vol 3 will begin allong with the return of .5 chapters.

leave a feed.

You asked for a feedback, so here it is .-.

I'll admit, I haven't read through. Certain things are preventing me. For one, it's general randomness and silliness seems more like a parody than anything else, which puts me off. The script-like functionality also hinders my view on your work - It creates a lack of atmosphere. You don't get to notice the subtle gestures that you otherwise would.

But when you DO put them in, it's in a separate line! Sure, it makes it easier to read for some, but it hurts my eyes. My brain connects the idea of spaces with separate entries - entries that are barely a sentence long. See below.

Quote from: [T.CC] "The infamous" Jai on June 29, 2014, 09:05:32 PM

Chapter 11
Spoiler

We see Jai has retaken his previous form.
[unneeded space]
Jai: We then let's finish this. GANGULAAAAA!!!!
[unneeded space]
Vidi: AHHHHH!!!
[unneeded space]
Both Charges at one another at fool force.
[unneeded space]

Which brings me to another point. You've recognized this flaw, so that's good, I guess. Spelling and grammar. Even the first sentence has the bare minimum of grammatical functions.

Quote

We reopen where we left off with Vidi preparing and extra crispy Jai.

There's capitalization, and a full stop. No comma to signify an idea change ([...]where we left off (COMMA) with[...]), and it's an*, not and.

Again, this is more of a nitpicking thing. It just hurts my eyes to see this. The only feedback I can offer you is to clean it up, or maybe get a proofreader.

Chapter 12

Spoiler

How did it come to this ?

My creation, my game, my fault.

We see a giant machine floating in the air, metal testicles extends from its body body.

Kuri: What is that thing ?

GM : A cradle ?

Sandra: Well this looks interesting.

We see Sandra surrounded by butlers wearing masks.

Both Jai and Vidi stare at the floating object with astonishment, which does not last.

Vidi tries to parry at Jai with has lance, only to be blocked as both men clash with steel in hand.

Jai: Are you mad ? Look at that thing.

Vidi:...not my problem.

We see the Game Master staring at a screen showing the cradle.

Back at the ship we see Kuri and the crew staring at the cradle as hit slowly floats towards them.

Jaden: Jaden is back baby and i feel so good- what is that ?

Kuri: Never seen anything like it before.

CW: Target locked.

The cradle charges a huge beam.

Kuri: Evade !!!

The Ship Narrowly evades a large beam that creates a giant hole inside a mountain.

Kuri: Jaden and everyone else that can pilot a suit or fly in the sky ENGAGE THE ENEMY !!!

Jaden: Roger dodger.

Kuri: I hope Zara hurry's.

Raijin is seen in the hanger getting out of his machine as the pit crew comes to assist.

Raijin: What's happening ?

Man: We're under attack again.

Man#2: Here.

The second man hands Raijin a walky-talky.

Kuri: Raijin, have you brought it back.

Raijin: Yea...

We zoom out to see the banshee is being worked on in the hanger.

Raijin:...I brought it.

Back on the ground we see Jai and Vidi still in combat.

GM: ENOUGH !!!

The Game Master suddenly appears around every area there is at least one person.

GM: To all fighters still in the game, I order all of you to sees all combat and listen.

A picture of the cradle appears in the air.

GM: This is your target. If this thing is defeated, everyone who survives after its defeat will move on to the next round.

Kuri: Now there's a next round ?

GM: That is all.

The Game Master looks at both Jai and Vidi.

GM: You two have strong spirits.

Jai: You're talking to us ?

GM: No I'm talking to the tree's. Now how would one of you like to get some cool powers ?

Vidi: What's really happening ?

GM: What do you mean ?

Jai: He's right. Why would you stop everyone from fighting in order to take down one boss.

GM: You guys really want to know the truth ? Fine.

As many of the ships crew fly towards the cradle lead by Jaden, it releases many machine people.

GM: Up there, thats called the cradle, it's a flying factory that makes machines. We have to stop it before it infects more of the arena program.

As many for the crew engage the machines many fall before them.

Raijin: This is insane.

We see the Galaxy and the Banshee standing side by side as the machines begin to close in.

A beam comes from out of nowhere hitting some of them, the shooter is revealed to be the unicorn piloted by Zara.

Zara: There's too much.

The Unicorn's cockpit door is rip's off by a cyber golem.

Just as the golem prepares to fire at Zara, a missile hits it.

Lance: Fire second shot.

The dragon fire's another shot in the sky. Many people and creatures appear to battle the machines.

The cradle charges another, while many machines hold many people hostage.

The can only watch are the cradle prepares its shot.

Two stripes, one black, one red are seen zipping threw the sky, destroying many of the machines holding the people.

GM: now which one of you should get the power ?

Vidi: Easy i should.

We see Vidi in a black armor with wings slashing many machines.

GM: No objection ?

Jai: We don't have time, after what you told us. My friends are in danger. So give him the powers.

We see a red streak zip threw the sky.

Raijin: This feeling, its's...

GM: Well it thats how you feel. Then i will give both of you powers the are equal to mods for the duration of this game.

Jai:Majestic Jai time!!!

Jai in a similar to Vidi colored red with gold accents fly's to the ship, destroying many of the mines on it.

Raijin:...my bro.

Kuri: So much power.

Jaden: (Is he a mod now ?)

The cradle fire's in the path of Jai and the ship, which is full of cyber men on it.

Jai: Nutz!!!

Kuri: No good where to heavy !!!

Many in the path of the beam are it untill it hits the Galaxy and banshee who both stopped the beam.

Both Machines emit a green light as both pilots helmet's eye guards shatter.

The pilot of the banshee removes her's to reveal a girl piloting the machine.

Raijin: Kuri...Jai.

Both Kuri and Jai reacts as they hear Raijin's voice in there heads.

Raijin: Fight on.

The Galaxy Explodes in the air as the beam halt's.

Jai: Raiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii!!!!

Kuri: Raijin.

Vidi: Jai Hearts, we don't have time to stop.

Jai: Let's to this Vidi, this fight isnt just the two of us.

Many others fire at the cradle as it need to recharge.

Both Jai and Vidi charges at the cradle's main cannon destroying it.

We see both in the cradle fighting off many machines and move forward.

They reach the room with a huge glass filled with light.

Vidi: That must be the main power source.

The cyber women tries to attack Vidi, but she is no mach for him. Vidi quickly stabs her in the chest.

CW:Thank... you.

Jai stands in-front of the light and prepares to strike it. His mind flashes back to all his adventures in the second volume.

Jai: Finally.

Jai Leaps at the light smashing the glass, the screen fades to black.

I thought it was all some kind of joke at first, never believing that this could possibly happen to me.

I should have known better.

The Game Master sits infont of a screen with a list of names and photo's of many people, among them Raijin.

GM: This is all my fault. And I am gonna fix it.

END OF VOLUME 2

Next up volume 3 starting with chapter 12.5 the origin of arena.

leave some feedback.

Quote from: T.CC WightKitty on June 30, 2014, 10:23:24 AM

You asked for a feedback, so here it is .-.

I'll admit, I haven't read through. Certain things are preventing me. For one, it's general randomness and silliness seems more like a parody than anything else, which puts me off. The script-like functionality also hinders my view on your work - It creates a lack of atmosphere. You don't get to notice the subtle gestures that you otherwise would.

But when you DO put them in, it's in a separate line! Sure, it makes it easier to read for some, but it hurts my eyes. My brain connects the idea of spaces with separate entries - entries that are barely a sentence long. See below.

Quote from: [T.CC] "The infamous" Jai on June 29, 2014, 09:05:32 PM
Chapter 11
Spoiler

We see Jai has retaken his previous form.
[unneeded space]
Jai: We then let's finish this. GANGULAAAAA!!!!
[unneeded space]
Vidi: AHHHHH!!!
[unneeded space]
Both Charges at one another at fool force.
[unneeded space]

Which brings me to another point. You've recognized this flaw, so that's good, I guess. Spelling and grammar. Even the first sentence has the bare minimum of grammatical functions.
Quote
We reopen where we left off with Vidi preparing and extra crispy Jai.
There's capitalization, and a full stop. No comma to signify an idea change ([...]where we left off (COMMA) with[...]), and it's an*, not and.

Again, this is more of a nitpicking thing. It just hurts my eyes to see this. The only feedback I can offer you is to clean it up, or maybe get a proofreader.

thanks for your feedback.

while i dont agree with you on the extra space i am the opposite of what you feel, where are words croped up on one another on a pc hurts my brain like something fierce.

parody ? might as well call it that.

and as for the capitalization, and a full stop. they already know what happened in the last chapter so there is no need to revisit the whole event in my book.

but thank you for your feedback and i will take them into consideration.

cray vivire will return sooner then thought.

The idea is cheasy, childish and forced together, still, it's better than Twilight I guess...

But on a serious note, the layout and the way it's done is more like a mock script rather than fan service/book, I think you need to be a hell of a lot more descriptive than you are instead of leaving everything up to the readers imagination, this has been a problem since the first post, where on number 12 and instantly back to the save stuff, same errors and little effort into descriptive writing.

We see a giant machine floating in the air, metal testicles extends from its body body. <- Body body?

Kuri:"What is that thing ?" - How did Kuri feel, how did she say it, where is the emotion? Is she happy, surprised, scared excited? what is going through Kuris head?

Kuri:"What is that thing ?" Said Kuri in awe as the giant mechanical entity drew closer - see, little effort but sounds much better

GM : A cradle ? - who is he talking to, what is he doing and again! how did he respond, no descriptive...anything, the character is showing nothing

"GM : A cradle ?" GM responded, snapping is head to the character that Marik forgot, fear started to build up in every cell is his body as the entities

Sandra: Well this looks interesting.\\\\\
----------------------------------------------------------------->pretty much said it all above
Sandra: Well this looks interesting.////

The idea isnt terrible, the implementation is.

Those shit description I gave where written inbetween calla at work, what's stopping you?

Area Forum

Cardfight!! Vanguard => Creative Works => Topic started by: Jai Hearts on May 26, 2014, 10:31:24 PM